To Save a Life
by Riverbkstar
Summary: Amy meets Ricky and falls madly in love, only to find out that he has 6 months to live. Her only way to save him requires finding herself ... Could your love outlast a medical disaster? *Updated on the first of every month* *In Progress*
1. Teaser

**COMING August 1st 2012**

* * *

New Story brought to you by Riverbkstar.

* * *

_What would you do if the person you loved with all your heart was dying?_

Below is an actual written trailer of the story. Picture it as a little you tube video. The scenes skip quickly as they would in an actual video. The plot makes no sense on any means but gives you some little insight into what the story is going to be about. Please note, spoilers are not included and there is a lot more to the plot than I let on.

Trailer:

(Image of cemetery)

Amy's voice: I met him on a Saturday…

(Screen fades in)

(Amy standing in bright room, next to young man in hospital gown sitting in wheelchair)

Amy: So you're a patient?

Young man: Four years running…

(Screed flashes out) (Flashes back in)

Amy: I'm Amy by the way

Young man: Ricky

(Ricky looks at up at Amy and smiles through the day light)

* * *

(Scene flips)

(Martial Bowman and Amy out in hallway of hospital)

Martial: What exactly are you doing here Amy?

Amy: I came to see him

(Martial slams fist against the wall in rage)

Martial: He's not some cute puppy in the window Amy! He's dying!

Amy: You think I don't know that?

(Screen goes black)

(Flashes into Ricky asleep on bed)

(How to save a life by the Fray plays – Between the lines of fear and blame, you begin to wonder why you came)

* * *

(Scene Flips)

(Amy and Ricky in the dark, in each other's arms on bed. Amy rests head on his chest)

Amy (whispering) Are you scared?

Ricky: Scared I won't be here for you…

(Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness and I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known - How to save a life)

* * *

(Scene Flips)

(Amy on floor, sobbing, clutching stomach)

(Screen fades grey)

(Fades back in to Martial in waiting room)

Martial: He's going to be okay…

(Amy hugs him)

Amy: I love you dad…

(Screen goes black)

* * *

(Scene flips)

(Amy and Ricky in living room)

(Let him know that you know best, because after all you do know best…)

Ricky (Yelling): I'm done trying to be perfect for you! One little mistake and – and… you freak out!

(Lay down a list of what is wrong. The things you told him all along)

Amy: It's not just some little mistake! It's just that…

(Pray to God he hears you, and pray to God he hears you!)

* * *

(Scene flips to Amy in chapel, head bowed)

Amy's voice: I'm asking for a miracle…

(Screen goes black)

_Could your love outlast a medical disaster? _

(Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness and I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known - How to save a life)

* * *

(Scene flips)

(Amy in gown, Ricky in suit)

(Ricky kisses Amy)

Ricky: I love you… (He reaches down to her stomach and touches it) And you…

(Scene flips)

(Amy on stage, receiving diploma)

Announcer's voice: Amy Jeurgens!

* * *

(Scene jumps)

(Ricky collapsed on floor, coughing)

(People surround him)

(Amy screams)

(Screen goes black)

_Is love worth fighting for?_

(Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness and I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known - How to save a life)

Amy's voice: Are you scared to die?

Ricky's voice: I don't know… Ask me Tomorrow

(Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness and I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known - How to save a life)

**To Save a Life**

**COMING AUGUST 1st**

Please review for earlier publication date.


	2. Ask Me Tomorrow

I met him on a Saturday. The first Saturday of February. Grace, my half-sister and her step-father took me to the local hospital to volunteer so I could earn the last eight community service hours I needed to graduate. I had just started my last semester of high school down at Grant and had fallen behind on my requirements. Grace was the same age as me. We were actually a month apart. Her birthday was in June and mine was in July. Grace never fell behind on anything. She wanted to become a doctor like her step-father, Dr. Bowman.

Grace and I have the same father. George Jeurgens. My dad was married to Grace's mom Kathleen but he cheated on her three weeks before finding out she was pregnant with Grace. They got divorced right after Grace was born and my dad married my mom Anne, the woman he had slept with and conceived a baby with while still married. Two years later, my parents had another baby girl and named her Ashley. The doctor who delivered her was Dr. Marshall Bowman. He wasn't an OB/GYN but a paediatrician. Ashley had been born premature and Dr. Bowman was sent to the rescue. Kathleen had been at the hospital for moral support and claims that's when she fell in love. I highly doubt it. He is rich. Very rich.

I remember the morning of our first confrontation because of the song on the radio. 'Haven't Met You Yet' by Michael Buble was playing. This was one of my all time favourite songs and Grace had convinced me a long time ago to believe in omens. I stood before my closet debating what to wear. What do you wear to a hospital filled with sick children? Suddenly, I heard a knock at my bedroom door and turned to see the usual bubbling Grace leaning on my door frame.

"Come on Ames" Grace chirped "Dad's waiting"

"He's your dad, not mine. I'm only going with you on your weekly visit because I need the hours" I snarled back. I know I was extra cranky that day though for the life of me, I can't remember why.

"Didn't I promise you that you were going to love going? Now come on. What you have in your hands is fine. These are sick kids under the age of 12, not the Oscar nominees."

I watched Grace leave the room and quickly threw on the outfit that hung on the hanger in my hand. I was down stairs within three minutes and was kindly handed a blueberry bagel and a coffee by Dr. Bowman. He had insisted I call him Marshall but I refused. Dr. kept him at a distance which was as close as I wanted to get.

"I picked it up on the way over here." Dr. Bowman mumbled, referring to the breakfast "Grace just loves blueberry so I figured you wouldn't mind one either"

"No. It's great." I stammered. I really did like blueberry but he had gotten whole wheat to satisfy Grace's health obsession and I hated whole wheat. In my opinion, bleached bread was the only way to go "Thanks"

We got in the car and drove for what seemed like forever. The car ride seemed extra long because my ipod battery had died on me the moment after pulling out of the driveway and I was left alone in the backseat to hear Grace and her step-dad giggle about some comedy show on television. By 9, we were at the hospital. I had only been here three times before. Once when Ashley was born, once when I was five and had sprained my ankle flying off a trampoline at a friend's house and last year when **my **dad and I had come to pick up Grace from an afternoon with Dr. Bowman.

* * *

Dr. Bowman signed us in at the front counter on the third floor. This was the paediatrics floor. Dr. Bowman had some rounds to attend to and sent Grace and I, name tags in tow, into a large rec. room filled with a bunch of kids in wheel chairs. Grace said they were the terminally ill. Which meant they were going to die if they didn't get exposed to a cure or find a transplant of some kind. It made me sick to think that I would most likely live longer than all the kids here.

Grace introduced me to some of the nurses in the room, along with some parents. The parents are what struck me the most. Most of them couldn't have been any older than 33 and yet, their faces made them look so old and tired. These parents had been to hell and back and were sill fighting with all they had left to keep their child alive. It made me think of my own parents, and how lifeless they had been when Ashley was a newborn.

Grace started some of the kids off with crafts. Most of them weren't allowed to hold scissors being heavy bleeders and too weak to cut. So Grace and I did most of the work, following the directions of where to stick what and how. By 11, I was exhausted yet completely thrilled. This place was amazing. It really made me hate myself for thinking Grace was crazy after all those times she had invited me to go. One by one, the children were wheeled back to their rooms for lunch and a nap. Only a few of the older children remained. Grace left the room to go find her dad for some lunch money which was when I began pacing the floor.

I circled the nurses station and peered into some empty rooms with the doors left open. When I returned to the rec. room a few minutes later, Grace still hadn't returned. I disappointedly sat in one of the chairs next to the large door and that's when I saw him. Sitting there, all alone. You could tell he was deep in solemn thought by the way he gazed out the window. He hadn't been there before. Had he? I would have seen him if he was. Curiosity got the better of me and I stood up from my chair and began making my way towards him.

His wheelchair was parked next to the large glass window that let light into the entire room. His right arm leaned on his armrest and he rested his head sideways in his right palm. The winter sunlight streaked across him so beautifully, I could see every strand of his short, curly brown hair shimmer in it's vastness. I stood behind him, not making a sound. I didn't dare to move until he did. He stayed frozen for such a long time I was scared he had fallen asleep… or worse. Finally, he lifted his head with a sniffle and turned to his right, catching a glimpse of me out of the corner of his eye.

"Wh-What?" He whispered "Oh Sorry, I thought you were a nurse"

"Nope" I said with a weak smile "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be standing here like this. I'll be going now" A part of me was totally embarrassed. For one reason, I think I had genuinely startled him. Isn't there some kind of rule that says you can't wake a daydreamer? No wait, that's sleep walker. For another reason, he was so adorable. He was slightly pale but you could barely see it through his dark tan. His lips were a light shade of pink and his eyes sparkled hazelnut. He looked like an angel.

"No wait. Where are you going to go? It's a small floor" He joked "I'm sorry. Did you need something?"

"No, I'm just waiting for my sister."

"Grace?"

"Yea, how did you know?"

"She comes here almost every Saturday to see the kids. I come in here some days when my room gets the better of me. She said she had a sister around her age coming in today so I just assumed"

"So you're a patient?"

"Four years running."

"You don't have to tell me" I said quickly. Did I even want to know?

"No it's okay. CF. But that's my disease. My name is Ricky"

"Amy"

"Nice to meet you Amy. How come you've never been in before. You'd think with a sister like Grace, you would have been in here months ago."

"I'm kind of busy, with school…"

"It's okay, I get it. This place can be real scary at first"

It struck me how well Ricky knew me, and how open he was to talking. I was about to falsely retaliate in denial but didn't get my chance. Ricky's face turned white and his eyes bugged out of his head. His threw his hand up to his mouth and doubled over in his chair, hysterically coughing. From behind me, I heard my name be called and saw Grace dash to Ricky's side before I had the chance to move.

Grace pulled the oxygen mask that was hanging off the left handle of the chair and held it onto Ricky's face. I hadn't even noticed the mask before this nor had I noticed the large oxygen tank that sat on the edge of the chair at the back. Grace helped Ricky sit back up in his chair, his light blue robe all wrinkled, and handed him the mask which he held tightly to his face. I still remember the faint muffled coughs that escaped from his chest underneath the plastic guard.

Grace pulled me outside of the rec. room and ordered me to stay put while she found a nurse. She returned a moment later, fuming mad.

"What the hell Amy?" She barked

"What, I didn't do anything!"

"You didn't think to hand him the mask?"

"I don't know! I panicked! That's why I didn't want to come before this. I knew I'm no good!"

"It isn't a matter of being good or bad. These people are dying Amy. You've got to be careful"

"So he is?"

"What?"

"Ricky's dying?"

"Yes. Why the hell do you think he's in here?"

"I don't know. He said he had CF and he seems so much older."

"Cystic Fibrosis Amy. His lungs are failing him. He's nineteen. And the only reason he is still in peds is because my dad is his doctor. My dad has been caring for Ricky since he came here four years ago coughing blood. Ricky's parents are in jail and his single foster mom lost her banking job three years ago. She works nights at the car factory downtown but only a small portion of her pay check goes to Ricky's bills. My dad and the hospital find a way to cover the rest. That's why it is so important that he lives Amy. You can't go around standing still if someone needs help"

"I- I didn't know. I'm sorry" I was shocked. His story made me want to cry. To my left, I saw two nurses and a doctor push Ricky out on a gurney, an orderly following close behind with Ricky's empty chair. A part of me was tempted to follow and see which room Ricky was in but I knew Grace was already peeved and hungry so I reluctantly followed her downstairs to the cafeteria.

That night, I laid in bed with my mind running circles around me. I couldn't stop thinking of Ricky and what had happened in the rec. room. I felt so terrible for standing still and even worse for not knowing what to do for Ricky. He seemed like such a nice guy yet life had dealt him every wrong card in the pile. I knew there was no way I was falling asleep that night. I pulled away my covers and crept over to my desk, grabbing my laptop and opened a window to Google. Without thinking, I typed into the search bar 'Cystic Fibrosis'.

* * *

The next morning, I woke up with a slight migraine. Probably it had something to do with the four hours I had slept. I had stayed up half the night researching CF and was pretty sure I had had nightmares after finally turning off my computer around 4 am. I had to get back to that hospital somehow. Grace was at her mom's house for the rest of the week and Dr. Bowman was home for the day, being that Sunday's were his only day off. I quickly showered and got dressed in a similar outfit to the one I had worn the day before. I grabbed a twenty off my dresser for bus fair and breakfast and was out the door after leaving a note on the kitchen table.

* * *

I got to the hospital by 10:10. The place was just as busy as yesterday. Grace had once told me that the Emergency room had a lot more patients on the weekends with late night partiers and drivers. I didn't know if it was true, but it sure seemed legit to me. I took the elevator up to the third floor and walked up to the nurses station. I lied saying I had left my jacket here the day before and wanted to have a quick look around. The nurse remembered me from yesterday and told me to take all the time I needed. She doubted I would find it but wished me luck either way.

I thanked her and followed a hallway that trailed into the same direction Ricky had been pushed to yesterday. A few of the room's were open and I began peeking inside each one. I didn't know what I was doing there exactly, but all I knew was that I had to see Ricky again. The last two rooms in the hall were smaller than the others. The one on the right was locked so I turned my attention to the other one with it's door opened halfway. I peeked inside and caught a glimpse of a young man under his covers. I think my heart skipped a beat.

I lightly knocked on the door, testing to see if Ricky would open his eyes. He seemed to be lost in a deep sleep but I had been wrong before. Heaven behold, he opened his eyes right away and looked up at me, surprised. His shock disappeared within seconds and was replaced by a smile.

"Hey You" Ricky whispered, not daring to get up. He was exhausted even though it seemed like he had slept all night.. unlike me.

"Hey. I just wanted to stop by and apologize."

"For what?"

"You know, not being able to move when you had that fit"

"Nah. Don't be sorry. I was having a bad day yesterday. I should have kept the mask in my hand instead of somewhere I couldn't reach"

"Grace really let me have it"

"Don't listen to her. I'm glad you stopped by. I kind of wanted to see you again. All I know about you is your first name"

"I wanted to see you too. I hope you don't mind but Grace explained your situation to me"

"I figured she might. It's okay. Enough people know by now. If I'm not okay with it, I don't think I ever will be"

"I have a couple of questions for you but you don't need to answer them all today. You don't have to answer them at all. I'd hate to make you uncomfortable or worse, be lectured by my sister again."

"No, it's fine. Ask away. But on one condition" He stated, forcing himself to sit up

"What?" I took a step forward

"I get to ask my questions first"

Another Step. "What do you want to know?"

"How old are you?"

"18. My birthday is in July. You?"

"19. My birthday is in December. Will you leave me your number?"

"That depends. Do you have a phone?"

"They let me have it on good days. Other days, I'm too sick. Do you have a boyfriend?"

"No. Do you have a girlfriend?"

"Of course I do. Me and the nurse with the purple laces are like this" He teased, crossing his fingers

"Come on." I said laughing, slowly sitting down at the foot of Ricky's bed

"What?" He chuckled "... Okay. Next question.. Are you scared to kiss a CF patient?"

"No. Are you scared to kiss an obsessive compulsive C minus mess?"

"Maybe, You know someone like that?"

"You know what I mean"

"I know what you mean and No, I'm not, because I don't know anyone like that. All I see is this pretty girl who doesn't know what she does to people. You're special Amy."

"You can tell all that just from our two conversations?" I said moving closer to Ricky so that we were a ruler's length apart

"Of course I can."

"How?" I asked, leaning in even closer. I could feel his breath on my cheek

"You came back." He whispered, pulling me in from the back of my neck

"One last question" I whispered, our noses touching

"What?"

"Are you scared to die?"

"I don't know" He said, as our lips touched "Ask me Tomorrow"


	3. It Wont Be Easy

**COMING MARCH 2013!**

A NEW STORY BROUGHT TO YOU BY Riverbkstar !

"Red" will be a 5-Shot FutureFic featuring Ricky and Amy like you have never seen before! I cannot wait for you all to read it!

To see the story before the story, please watch the trailer for "Red" and the link below! Comment and Like the video for earlier publication!

watch?v=dZDti-fY_zo

* * *

Over the next few weeks, I snuck out to see Ricky a lot. I didn't go back to the hospital on the days Grace was visiting and was always extremely careful not to bump into Dr. Bowman. I had copied his work schedule from Grace's school agenda. Why she kept her dad's work schedule written down somewhere was beyond my understanding, but just the same, it worked in my favour.

I wouldn't necessarily say Ricky and I were a couple. We had only kissed the one time and it was for like a whole two seconds. Just a small peck really. Ricky didn't have the energy to be intimate or physical and even if he did, he needed all the oxygen possible which meant me sucking it up with my face wasn't really a good idea. I liked being around Ricky. He made life exciting even though we were always in the same grey hospital room, just talking.

Ricky explained his birth parents to me. Not only were they both in jail for drug abuse but Ricky's mom had physically abused him when he was five. She came home from work some nights completely stoned and spanked Ricky if his behaviour didn't satisfy her, which it almost never did. Ricky's neighbours had called the police one night when his screams got too loud and he was placed in a group home until a family took him in as a foster child three years later. He still had the same parents after all those years. Unfortunately, when Ricky was 11, his foster dad had died in a car accident. Four years later, Ricky was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis.

I remember one night with Ricky specifically. All other conversations seem to be a tight blur up until this point. It was almost 10 pm and my curfew was set for 11 so I knew I had to get going. Ricky asked me to stay until he fell asleep. Visiting hours were long gone but one of the nurses had let me stay as long as it wasn't past midnight. I sat in the chair next to Ricky's bed, with him lying parallel to the floor under his sheets.

"Does it hurt sometimes Ricky?" I asked concerned, as I stroked his brown curls away from his forehead. He seemed to like it.

"Not really. It's more scary than anything. Those moments when you can't breathe and the coughs take over."

"Does it scare you that you could die?"

"I am going to die Amy.." He mumbled angrily as if I hadn't realized "but no. It doesn't"

"It scares me. I'm scared that I'll walk in here one day and some other person will be in your bed."

"I'll make sure to leave you a note, should it ever happen" he teased, his head rocking back and forth as he struggled to cough and breathe at the same time. I stood up and helped him sit up. I had gotten quite good at caring for him during his fits. He had showed me where to go should he need a doctor and what to give him when he needed something. Ricky took deep breaths, in through his nose and out through his mouth. Eventually the coughing subsided and I removed my hand from where it lay on his chest and helped him lie back down.

"Thanks" He whispered

"I'd be sad"

"Huh?"

"If you left and all I had was a note"

"I was only joking"

"I know.." I mumbled, watching Ricky close his eyes, tiredly "Are you scared Ricky?"

"Of what?"

"Not that you could die or will die. Are you scared to die?"

"I don't know" he mumbled, his voice getting thinner as he fell asleep "Ask me tomorrow"

That was the last time I ever saw him. For the month of course. School had gotten really busy and complicated. I was juggling four classes as well as applying to colleges inside and out of state. It was the second week of March before I had the chance to go back and visit Ricky. Just as I was arriving on the main level of the hospital, a scary thought hit me. I had forgotten to copy Dr. Bowman's work schedule from Grace's agenda. There was a pretty good chance he was working today. I had already phoned and told Ricky I was coming which meant I couldn't just leave.

I gathered up my courage and took the elevator to the third floor, signed in as a visitor and made my way to Ricky's room. Room 311. I stopped in the doorway, with my heart in my throat. There, next to Ricky was Grace's step-dad, checking over Ricky's chart. He was speaking in the friendly voice he used with patients, debriefing Ricky on his current state when Ricky's eyes flashed towards me and lit up the room with his smile.

"There she is" He said happily

"Hey Ricky" I whispered, shyly stepping into the room "Hi Dr. Bowman"

"Hi Amy." Dr. Bowman greeted, surprised "What are you doing here? Is Gracie with you?"

"No" I apologized, through gritted teeth

"She's here to see me Marshall" Ricky intervened, before turning towards me "You call your dad Dr. Bowman?"

"He's my sister's step-dad"

"Yes. See Amy likes to keep me at a distance. Isn't that right Amy?"

I nodded my head, not letting my eyes leave the floor, feeling my face turn a bright shade of red pepper.

"I think you should call him Marshall. I do" Ricky said casually

"Can I see you outside for a minute Amy?" Dr. Bowman asked, breaking the awkward silence that stung the room like antiseptic alcohol.

"Sure Dr. Bowman" I mumbled before hearing a giant EHEM from Ricky's direction "Sure Marshall" I rephrased.

Marshall led me outside to the hallway and closed the door behind him.

"What exactly are you doing here Amy?"

"I came to see Ricky"

"After all this time? Five weeks later?"

"No. I've been coming here a lot since the day you brought me. Ricky and I are friends"

"Friends?" He said, sternly "So you have just been sneaking in and out of this hospital for the past month and you didn't think to let me know what you were up to?"

"I didn't think it was anything to concern you with"

"He's my patient Amy. A terminally Ill patient. He isn't making good decisions and apparently neither are you."

"What are you talking about?"

"What happens when he dies Amy? What are you going to do. How are you going to cope? Friends or more, it is going to be the worse thing that ever happens to you. Are you ready for that?"

I stared coldly at the floor, feeling every word like a punch to the face.

"And what happens if he lives long enough for you to go to college. What happens if you leave state or move so far away that these weekly visits turn into twice a year visits? How is he going to cope knowing that his only friend has forgotten him."

"Your acting like befriending him is a bad thing"

"It isn't a bad thing. It's a great and respectable thing. But you're just not ready. Neither of you are"

"If Grace was doing this, you would let her"

"If Grace was doing this, I would say the exact same things I am saying to you. Grace knows she isn't ready for this kind of commitment. That is why I only let her come twice a month if she's lucky. I don't want her getting attached"

"I can handle it. He's my friend. I care about him. I'm not going to leave him just because I think things are going to get too hard."

"You start off visiting on the days your homework is easy. Like you are doing today. Soon it doesn't matter what school is asking from you, you're here almost every day. Then on weekends and before you know it, you have spent your entire senior year in a hospital room with someone who won't even be at your graduation."

"Please, Dr. Um. Marshall. I know what I'm doing. Please. Let me help him through this"

"It's not going to be easy Amy." He warned. To this day, I still hear those words ringing in my head.

"I know."

"Then it's all yours. You let me know the days you want to visit and I'll set you up with a pass to come in as you please. But on a few conditions"

"I'm listening"

"No physical contact. He doesn't have the energy nor is it healthy for him right now."

"Okay"

"Two. You stand by him until the end. Doesn't matter how hard things get, you're in this 1000 percent."

"Okay."

"That's it"

"That's it?" I asked eagerly

"Yep. Go on."

"Thank you Marshall!" I cheered, pulling him in for a hug, It was the first hug I ever gave him. It wouldn't be the last

"Oh and Amy!" He called, as I turned to go back into the room

"Don't tell Gracie. Not yet anyways."

I nodded my head understandingly and dashed back into the room.

Over March Break, I put up camp in Ricky's room. He had been feeling a lot better and was allowed out of his bed and around the entire floor. I pushed him around the rec. room and nurses station. He conned me into bringing him down to the caf for some partially real food. I knew I wasn't supposed to, but seeing how happy he was to be out and about got the better of me and before I knew it, I was buying us both lunch.

I didn't want to give Ricky anything super unhealthy because I was scared he would blow up. So I got him a salad with chicken strips which he gobbled up even though he had strictly told me to get him a burger. Once we were finished, Ricky sat back in his chair fully satisfied.

"Thank you" He said, breaking our own sweet silence "I needed that"

"I'm glad. Just don't tell anyone or else I'll probably be banned for life"

"You know what I'd really like?"

"I'm not getting you dessert" I teased

"No Ames!" He said laughing "Id like to go out"

"Like a date?" I asked shocked

"Like a date" He agreed, lowering his voice and grabbing my hands "I want to get to know you outside of our friendship. Maybe more personally. More intimately." His voice was a dead whisper which was incredibly hard to hear over my pounding heart. He lifted his hand and stroked away the loose strands of hair that had fallen over my face.

"I feel the same way" I stumbled, my mouth dry like sandpaper

"Good. So how about tonight?"

"Tonight" I whispered, leaning in for a kiss. It wasn't too short like our first one or too long that Ricky went into a fit. It was perfect. Nothing and everything like I had imagined my first kiss would be. I'm not completely sure but I think I started to cry. Ricky comforted me by pulling me in for a hug. I hadn't noticed up until that point how strong and sincere he really was. It made me feel loved. It brought me into love. Someplace I had never been before and have never left, even to this day.

* * *

**Follow me on twitter riverbkstar and on Keek - Riverbstar ! Mention you are from Fanfiction and I'll follow you back!**


	4. First Date

**COMING MARCH 2013!**

A NEW STORY BROUGHT TO YOU BY Riverbkstar !

"Red" will be a 5-Shot FutureFic featuring Ricky and Amy like you have never seen before! I cannot wait for you all to read it!

To see the story before the story, please watch the trailer for "Red" and the link below! Comment and Like the video for earlier publication!

watch?v=dZDti-fY_zo

* * *

I hurried to get dressed. After our outing in the cafeteria, I had brought Ricky back up to his room to get some sleep where luckily, no one waited for us. Once dropping him off, I raced home to get ready. Ricky was going to ask a nurse to clear the rec. room so we could have it all to ourselves. I hadn't known this before, but Ricky was a pretty popular guy. Everyone did what he asked as long as it wasn't threatening to his health. Well everyone except me that is.

I quickly showered and fought my daily mental battle of outfit dilemma by grabbing the nicest black dress I had and pulled it on without challenging it's worth for tonight's occasion. I was ready by 4:30 which was perfect because Ricky had told me to be back by 5. As luck had it, there was an accident on the route my bus was taking and we had to go the long way around town which took almost twice as long as it should have. I finally got to the hospital almost an hour after I had left home but was pleased to see my faulty punctuality had no effect on Ricky's plans.

"It's hospital food. It never gets cold" He joked when he saw me walk into the room. Ricky had changed out of his usual robe and pyjamas into dark blue scrubs with a stethoscope for a tie. I walked up to him and unbuttoned my jacket, hanging it on the back of my wheelchair. _Wheelchair?_

"I hope you don't mind but I thought it would be romantic. I'm a dork like that." Ricky apologized, embarrassed

"No it's sweet." I reassured, honestly feeling like the luckiest girl in the world

"Before we eat, I have a surprise for you" Ricky wheeled himself over to the small CD player that rested on the room's bookshelf and started a slow track. "While you were busy with school" he began, riding back over to me "I mastered up the courage to ask you out but since we can't go anywhere or do anything, I figured it would be nice if we could dance."

"Dance?" I asked confused

"Yep. So I asked one of the orderlies to teach me how to do just a simple one so I don't kill you with my horrible coordination skills"

"Is that why when ever I came by on those days, you were always in bed looking exhausted?"

"Let's just say I'm not asking a retired dance student for help again"

"That's the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me" I said through tears "but you didn't have to. I can barely dance myself"

"If I can do it… snakes can do it. Now come on. Help me out of this chair and let me prove to you all those coughing fits were worth this"

I nervously obeyed him (see how I'm a pushover) and helped him stand though he really could have done it on his own. Ricky leaned on me yet was still able to lead. I held on tightly to his neck and he strengthened the grip on my waist so he wouldn't fall. We danced in a small circle, really just walking back and forth to the music. It was the most romantic 45 seconds of my life, which was all it lasted before Ricky had had enough.

We sat down to eat, him chugging the water at the table. On our trays sat a cold bowl of soup and green jell-o with a glass of chocolate milk.

"I had to promise to read the kids a story tomorrow for the milk. I hate stories so you'd better drink up"

"Maybe I can come and help you. Put on a sideline puppet show or something"

"That's sweet but you have been here all week. You need some fresh air considering you start school again on Monday."

"I don't care about fresh air. I just like being with you"

"I feel the same way. Sometimes I wish I could go outside. I used to play baseball at my high school. When I wasn't here that is"

"When was the last time you were outside" I asked, taking a sip of my milk that wasn't really chocolate but white milk and syrup

"Last September. I was still eighteen and had completed all my delayed school work over the summer so I had just graduated. My friends from school who now are all in college, drove me up to a lake where they had partied at graduation. We spent the whole night outside camping. It was sort of a celebration because I was supposed to be getting a new lung which would potentially rid me of CF. but the lung ended up not being a match for me and I had a huge fit up at the lake. I was air lifted here and haven't been out since."

"Wow. I- I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. It must have been awful"

"The worst part is that throughout high school, I was always in and out of here. Nothing was ever this serious. You know that when you don't leave anymore, you're never coming out"

"Please" I said, my heart breaking at the pain searing into Ricky's voice. I placed my hand over his "don't say that. You can beat this thing. You have to"

"There are just those days when I don't know if I can. And I don't know if I want to. It's just" – but Ricky couldn't finish. He was having another fit. A really bad one. Ricky doubled over in his chair, the sound of fresh mucus uprooting itself from his chest. I looked for an oxygen mask but there wasn't one. I screamed for a nurse as loud as I could, physically not being able to run and get help because I was keeping Ricky up in his seat. If I let go, he would have crashed to the floor.

Finally help arrived and Ricky was wheeled off to his room, me following, tears making my makeup run like in a circus gone bad. Ricky's door was closed so I waited outside, pacing the floor. From his room I could hear hospital personal telling him to breathe but his coughs didn't stop. Eventually, noise settled and nurses and doctors left the room over time. I was let in about 20 minutes later, startled at how small and lifeless Ricky was versus how he had looked an hour ago. He slept motionless with his oxygen mask across his face. I came to sit down next to him but couldn't stand to just hold his hand. I slowly and silently moved to his side, laying down next to him on the bed. I rested my head on his shoulder and fell asleep staining his scrubs with my tears while watching his chest faintly rise and fall.

* * *

I was shaken awake the next morning by an unexpected visitor. My mom towered over me, concerned, calling my name over and over again. I opened my eyes, removing that blurred morning vision to realize I had slept by Ricky's side all night.

"Amy. You awake?"

"Mom?"

"What are you doing here Amy? We were up all night worried sick!"

"I'm sorry. I fell asleep" I mumbled, slowly sitting up so I didn't wake Ricky "what are you doing here?"

"Looking for you. I called everyone I knew. I tried your cell phone, your friends. It wasn't until Grace suggested we call Marshall and Kathleen that we figured out where you were"

"So everyone knows I've been coming here?" I asked, grabbing my things disappointedly and pulling my mom out of the room, carefully so I wouldn't disturb Ricky

"Pretty much. Did you have to keep it such a secret?"

"Yes! Who knows what you would have done if I had told you I'm dating a terminally ill patient?"

"Wait! Dating? Marshall said you were only friends"

"Shoot! That was one of our arrangements but mom please don't tell him! If he finds out, he is going to make me stop coming. And I really like Ricky."

"So all this really is, is a childhood crush? Amy!"

"No mom, it's not I swear! I'm not saying I love him but there is something here. It's not just Ricky and it's not just a sympathy case because he's sick. It's everything. He's special. I care about him mom!"

"You care about him so much that you lied for a month and a half about where you were almost every day?"

"Yes! Exactly! Wait no!"

"Amy it's okay. Marshall knows you like him. He told me that was one of your limits from the start because he wanted to keep your hands off each other for as long as possible. From what he tells me, Ricky is a pretty great kid."

"So.. what? I can come here and still date him?"

"Well it's not exactly dating Amy."

"I know! I know, you know what I mean! Thank you Thank you Thank you!" I squealed, pulling my mom in for a hug "I'm just going to say goodbye to Ricky and then we can go!"

I watched my mom walk over to the elevator and press the ground button before quietly opening the door to Ricky's room. He was awake, starring at the ceiling, lost in thought.

"Hey sweetie!" I whispered, kind of surprised at how natural those words felt coming out of my mouth

"Hey" Ricky whispered back, as loud as he could "I missed you. I'm sorry about last night"

"Don't be sorry. I'm glad you're okay. If you woke up at all last night, you know I slept here"

"Yea, I woke up with this heavy figure on me in the dark and got scared the dancing orderly had come back for more"

I let out a solid giggle and sat next to Ricky on the bed. "My mom is here. I forgot to call home last night so they were pretty freaked. But she said we can date.. or stay friends or whatever we want."

"I'd like to continue dating. But no more late night dinners or reckless dancing. Maybe movies on my TV screen and scrabble on Saturdays"

"Deal" I said, leaning down towards Ricky and kissing him on the lips. I went to pull away but he reached his hand up and held the back of my head in his hand, pulling himself up a little higher for more. We broke free, my breathing heavy, his short, and brought our foreheads together, neither one of us daring to blink.

"I'll be back on Tuesday" I whispered

"Can't wait" And I was gone.

* * *

In the car, sat my mom in the front, Ashley in the passenger and Grace in the back with me.

"So you couldn't just tell me?" Grace asked annoyed

"No because I knew you would react like.. like this!" I replied, raising my voice

"Of course I would. He's a sick patient Amy. Not just another one of your boyfriends you can get rid of when he doesn't call or buy you flowers"

"Why does everyone think I am in this for a boyfriend? I'm not stupid Grace. I know what is going on here. Ricky is dying!" The words caught me off guard and I choked "He-He's dying And-And there isn't anything anyone can d-do about i-it" My voice fluxuated and my eyes brimmed with tears

"Amy" Grace said slowly, not knowing what to say

"No Grace! No! Not one of your lectures about how you understand and know what is best because you don't! I care about Ricky. Not as much as I care about you or mom or dad or Ashley because I love you guys and you all know that. But I think one day I could love Ricky in the same way! I know he is dying. I know how careful we have to be. I know that this just may be the hardest thing I ever do and I'm okay with it. I have to be!" My mom stopped at a red light and turned towards me. I turned to face the window on my right, not wanting to hear what she had to say.

"Grace" My mom began "Why don't we just leave her alone. Your father and I already said she can continue to see him. It's her decision to decide if she should"

"I'm sorry Amy" Grace mumbled "I didn't want to give you a lecture" I turned at her and snarled through tears "Okay maybe I did but it is obvious you already know what I was going to say. Ricky is a really great guy. I hope he makes it through this so you two can be happy"

"Thanks Grace"

I didn't know it then but those words were a prayer to God. Someone I didn't really believe in until that moment. Someone who ended up saving my soul and saving my boyfriend.

* * *

**Follow me on twitter riverbkstar and on Keek - Riverbstar ! Mention you are from Fanfiction and I'll follow you back!**


	5. Finding God

**COMING MARCH 2013!**

A NEW STORY BROUGHT TO YOU BY Riverbkstar !

"Red" will be a 5-Shot FutureFic featuring Ricky and Amy like you have never seen before! I cannot wait for you all to read it!

To see the story before the story, please watch the trailer for "Red" and the link below! Comment and Like the video for earlier publication!

watch?v=dZDti-fY_zo

* * *

I raced to the elevator, acceptance letter in hand and eagerly pressed the number three button, watching it light up blue. Once off, I raced to Ricky's bedroom barely able to contain my excitement. It was the first week of April. Two months ago, I had met Ricky while volunteering in the children's ward with my half-sister Grace. In three months, I would be graduating from high school and going to the best and closest college around! I lightly frapped on the heavy door that opened to my boyfriend's dorm ( as he called it, when really it was one of the smallest hospital rooms in the whole building) and waited for him to turn around from his stance next to the window.

Ricky had been doing a lot better lately and things were going great for us. He no longer needed his wheel chair to get around. He was walking all on his own without any sign of trouble breathing. Of course he still had his attacks and was always close to high on his medication but doctors were considering sending him home if things improved. Ricky stood at the window to his room, looking out. I knew he was dreaming of baseball which always made him sad about his situation but knew my news would cheer him up.

Ricky turned to look at me , greeting me with that famous smile that made me jittery inside.

"Amy!"

"Hi baby!" I squealed, running over to him and giving him a tight hug. With my last few months of high school approaching, work was getting difficult and I was busier than ever which meant I was only with Ricky, Friday and Saturday nights. Today was a Wednesday so I knew he was extremely surprised

"What are you doing here?" He asked, hugging back, breaking free, kissing my lips and hugging me again.

"It came today!"

"NO! Your acceptance letter? To the school we wanted? Amy that's awesome!" Ricky enthused, grinning like the idiot I'd grown to love.

"Yup! I'm going to get to go to school barely 20 minutes away! I can live at home and come visit you almost anytime I want!"

"That's fantastic! I'm so happy for you.. for us! Come here!" Ricky pulled me in for another kiss, letting it linger. I wrapped my hands around his hair and gripped his curls with my fingers. Now that he was getting stronger, we were definitely more physical which sometimes sent him into fits but on some like today, he wasn't affected.

"But you know… maybe it won't matter after all. Weren't the doctors saying you had a ticket out of here if you got any better?"

Ricky's face fell flat as if he was hoping I wasn't going to bring up the topic "Errr. No Ames. They broke the news to me yesterday after I had a huge fit. The only way I'm getting out of here is if I get a new lung and the one they thought they had lined up for me went to some fifteen year old in Michigan"

"So what does that mean?" I asked confused, helping Ricky sit down on his covers "You're not getting better?"

"No I am.. Surprisingly, I am, but not enough to be healthy enough to leave."

"Well, there is still a chance you'll find a match right?"

"Yea, but I am a good ways down on the list of transplants."

"It will all work out Ricky. It has to." I cried, I wasn't sure who I was reassuring. Me or Him.

"We can only hope and pray."

"Yea.." I mumbled, as if the thought had just occurred to me "Pray"

"As long as you're here, do you want to watch something? My mom dropped off some movies from home for me while she was visiting." Ricky asked, turning towards a bin filled with movies cases and books.

"Your mom stopped by?" I asked surprised, walking over to him and rummaging through the assortment of entertainment myself

"Yea, she got her first day off in four months. Can you believe it?"

"Her work must suck"

"Yea, but she says it's easy. I'm glad. I'd hate for her to be stuck in something she really hates just so I can have enough pills every morning. You know?"

"Yea… I know" I said, smiling sweetly. Suddenly Ricky jumped as he pulled out a movie with a dark cover from the box.

"How about this one?" He asked, handing me the case. I squinted to see the title as it was a photocopied cover sheet.

"No I've seen it and didn't like it the first time." I said, handing the case back to him before grabbing another movie from the bin "What about this one?"

"Walk to Remember? Seriously?"

"What!" I exclaimed defensively "It's a timeless classic!"

"Titanic is a timeless classic. This is just depressing!"

"And hopelessly romantic" I mumbled, pouting my lip "Pleaseeee?"

"Alright fine!" Agreed Ricky

Ricky got settled under one of his multiple bed sheets that covered his bed as I turned on the movie before walking back and lying next to him, my head resting on his shoulder. As usual, I cried during the sad parts, burying my face into Ricky's chest. About halfway through, Ricky fell asleep and woke up half an hour later with a jolt, dazed and confused. Once the movie was over, we let the credits run and watched as the disc returned itself to the main menu. We laid there in silence until my curiosity got the better of me.

"What was his name?" I asked, my voice hidden behind Ricky's chin

"Who's" He replied, twisting his neck as best he could to look at me

"Your father's. Not your real dad, but your foster dad. The one who.."

"Died in a car accident?"

"Yea…. Him"

"Hmm" Ricky said pausing "Umm. John"

"Like Jonathan, or just John?"

"Just John. As far as I know. Why do you ask?"

"I don't know. This movie got me thinking. That was really the only thing I didn't know about you"

"Well you don't know lots of things. Like.. when is my birthday?"

"December 16th. Try again"

"What's my favourite colour?"

"Ecrew. You said you hate white because of hospitals yet you're so used to it so you like an off white versus the actual shade."

"Wow. I don't even remember saying that"

"Okay, I've got one." I said, brushing my fingers through his curls "Are you scared? … To die?"

I was hoping Ricky would be honest this time instead of blowing me off with another excuse. He stared at me deeply, trying to come up with an answer but simply shrugged his shoulders and flashed his eyes to a corner in the room, away from me.

"I don't know" He started "It's a heavy question. I don't really know. Why don't you ask me tomorrow hmm?"

I sat up, completely appalled but all I could mumble was "sure". I sat there and watched Ricky shuffle his chin deeper into his chest and cross his arms over his torso, hearing a hiss from his nose as he breathed out. Within minutes he was asleep and I was gone.

I don't know how I ended up there, maybe I was so angry and hurt that I wasn't thinking or maybe it really was a miracle. I snapped out of my daydream to find myself standing at the doors of the chapel located on the first floor of the hospital. The left door with stained glass windows was left open with the help of a wooden block which I stepped over as I entered.

No one was in the church but there were signs of human activity. Candles were lit by the dozens and bibles were pulled out of their stands and left in various places along the pews. There wasn't an official minister who dedicated his life to caring for the small room but custodial staff and community leaders stopped by to help with it's upbringing. This was what Ricky had told me, the one time we had come down here on the anniversary of his diagnosis. Which is how I knew where the chapel was.

I sat at the edge of a pew, two rows away from the door, feeling awkward and alone. I didn't really have a religion to follow or a God who answered my prayers. The last time I had been to church was a wedding back in 2005. I did what I had seen from television and movies. I placed my jacket and handbag next to me and kneeled down, my elbows supporting me as they leaned on the back of the wooden bench in front of me. I put my hands together and bowed my head, my thumb knuckles sitting on the dip of my nose. I can still remember my exact words that day.

"God… I don't know if you can hear me or what I'm doing here, but I could use your help. My boyfriend is dying and I don't know how to help him. He won't open up to me and isn't honest when I'm truthful with him. And each day.." I said, sniffling as I wiped away the first of my tears "Each day, I know my time with him is growing thinner. So I'm asking for a miracle or some kind of gift. Ricky needs a new lung or else he is going to die. He's really going to die and there's nothing I can do. But pray.. and keep faith as Ricky says. He is a really great guy God. He doesn't deserve this and as much as you may want to take back another angel, he belongs here. With me and his family. Out of a hospital, at home. Healthy and Happy. So I'm asking you again, God. Please. Let Ricky live."

I didn't go to the hospital for a while after that. I phoned Ricky and said I had caught a cold and didn't feel right bringing extra germs into a hospital. This bought me time. Time to sort out my feelings and get my priorities straight. The only way I knew how to do that was remove myself from society. I had hardly any homework that weekend so I decided to keep myself locked up in my room. I listened to music Ricky had suggested I download and laid on my bed flipping through pictures of us. The photos varied between us in his room and with other kids in the rec. room.

I loved seeing Ricky interact with other kids. He really showed his true colours when around them which to me proved he was an even greater person than I thought he was. I would sometimes let my mind wander and imagine him better and healthy ten years down the line. He would be a baseball coach for some university and I would teach fourth grade. We would have three children. Two boys and a girl. I would teach them how to read and Ricky would teach them how to pitch the perfect throw. I'd never get much further than that in my daydreams. Because Ricky and I would never have children or get married or live together. He probably wouldn't even be around when I graduated college.

Thinking like this always made me worked up and angry. I threw the small album to the floor and curled up in a ball, screaming into my pillow. I cried until I fell asleep that day, waking up to a football game on in the living room. My dad and Ashley were watching the halftime show and Grace was helping my mom cut carrots for that night's supper.

"Hi honey" My mom greeted "You hungry? Dinner will be ready in 20."

"No" I whispered "I'm not that hungry. I'm going to go out for a bit and probably pick something up on the way back"

"Okay. Suite yourself. I'll save you a plate if your dad doesn't eat everything like he did last night"

I nodded my head and made my way towards the front door. I pulled on my jean jacket and light blue converse, grabbed my bus pass form the hook next to the door and was out, down the street in seconds. It took about fifteen minutes for the bus to come which gave me time at the bus stop to think about where I really wanted to go. I couldn't go back to the hospital without being compelled to visit Ricky and admit that I lied but I also didn't want to ride around wasting the day. I decided to put the thoughts I had sorted in my head to good use and took the number 7 bus to the closest church around. This was the church Grace went to with her parents every other Sunday. I had of course been invited on numerous occasions, but me being me had always found some excuse to duck out last minute.

It was a quarter to six by the time I was dropped off at the closest stop to the little white building. The doors were unlocked as Grace always bragged they were, so I hesitantly walked inside, astounded at the beauty of the large stained glass pictures in the front foyer. I followed a burgundy carpet to two larger wooden doors and pushed one open, entering the main aisle of the church. This one had a lot more pews and a much more expensive décor than the chapel at the hospital.

I followed the carpet to the middle of the church and took a random spot on a bench. My mouth hung open in awe at the beauty before me. Once again, I didn't have much to say and felt just as silly as before but knelt down before God anyways. I don't remember what I asked God that day. I know it wasn't about the weather or grades at school, and I don't know if what I said had any effect on where I am today. But what I do know, is that in that moment, everything changed.

A voice from behind me interrupted the silence of the church as I finished my prayer with an 'Our Father'.

"That was lovely" The voice spoke, very regal and wise

I turned to see a man in black pants and a white flannel, yellow legal pad in hands, behind me.

"I'm sorry" I interjected, standing up "Was I too loud? I can leave if you need the space"

"No" The man pleaded "Sit down. I'm the minister here. I was just writing my sermon for tomorrow and came in here for some inspiration"

"You're the minister?"

"Yes. Welcome." He said, walking towards me "Who was the man you were praying for?"

"Oh.." I mumbled, shyly brushing a long strand of hair behind my ear "No one"

"He must be someone. You seemed to put a lot of effort into what you were saying."

"He's my boyfriend. Or he is for now"

"For now?" He asked, sitting next to me

"Yea.. He has cystic fibrosis. The doctors say without a lung transplant, there isn't any hope that he will live"

"Well, I for one have never been a real believer in what doctor's say. He.." the minster said, pointing up "makes all the decisions. He decides whether we live or die. Not doctors. You've asked God for help, obviously. You're doing the right thing here. Leaving it up to God."

"I just wish I knew if it was paying off. "

"He hears you. I'm sure of it.. Uhh.."

"Oh. I'm Amy. Amy Jeurgens"

"Reverend Samson"

"So you think he knows? Everything Ricky has been through… Everything I've been through?"

"Without a doubt and if it's in his plan, Ricky will make it. That is your boyfriend right? Ricky?"

"Yea. That's him. Ricky Underwood. Would you mind…"

"Praying for him on Sunday? Of course. You can light a candle for him on your way out if you would like" Reverend Samson offered, standing up from his seat "I have to get back to work but take as much time as you need. These doors are always open. And Amy… Don't worry. Everything will be alright. You'll see"

I nodded my head, pressing my lips together and watched the Reverend leave through the same doors he entered, figuring he must have gotten the inspiration he came for. I tilted my head to the ceiling, acknowledging God and whispered "Please let him be right". I stood up from my seat and was just about to light a candle before leaving but was distracted by a loud buzz from my pocket. I unlocked my phone and opened a text marked urgent from my mom. What it read, made my blood run cold and my heart stop pounding. I was out of the church and sprinting my life away running to my baby as fast as I possibly could. The message sat frozen in my mind and all I saw was it's haunting five word message.

HOSPITAL NOW! RICKY COUGHING BLOOD!

* * *

**Follow me on twitter riverbkstar and on Keek - Riverbstar ! Mention you are from Fanfiction and I'll follow you back!**


	6. Losing Faith

**COMING MARCH 2013!**

A NEW STORY BROUGHT TO YOU BY Riverbkstar !

"Red" will be a 5-Shot FutureFic featuring Ricky and Amy like you have never seen before! I cannot wait for you all to read it!

To see the story before the story, please watch the trailer for "Red" and the link below! Comment and Like the video for earlier publication!

watch?v=dZDti-fY_zo

* * *

"Out of my way!" I screamed, racing towards the closest elevator. Moments earlier, I had received a text from my mom telling me that Ricky was coughing blood. Ricky! My Ricky, in pain and in danger. It wasn't possible, it wasn't right. He had been getting better! They had said he was getting better.

I stopped abruptly behind a large crowd of visitors with newborn baby balloons waiting for the elevator currently at floor five. I let out a loud frustrated sigh and skidded away in the direction of the staircase. I flew up the hospital stairs horrified, my blood running cold. Time stood still as I ran, taking those ugly waxed steps two at a time. I couldn't have run any faster and yet it seemed like that prayer in the chapel was already years behind me.

I pushed through the insanely heavy metal door that led to the third floor of the hospital and sprinted through the main area filled with frantic nurses, my coat and purse flying high like a kite behind me. I reached Ricky's room out of breath and just about ready to collapse. My half -sister Grace stood against the wall opposite to Ricky's doorway, head in her hands, sobbing. My mom comforted her while starring into the hospital room, a dreaded concern smacked across her face.

Apparently Grace had been at the hospital all afternoon with her dad and had called home asking to be picked up. My mom had come up to meet Grace on the third floor of the hospital and was directed to Ricky's room where Grace was killing time, anxious to leave and start her homework. Ricky started off coughing as he had normally been doing for the past week or so, but his breathing became sporadic and his coughs grew sharp. Soon he was doubled over the side of his bed wheezing and hacking. Grace tried to help him sit up but saw a dark syrup dripping from his chin and fingers and stopped dead in her tracks. She called her dad and a bunch of other doctors into the room and was pushed out of the way. My mom texted me immediately and went into overdrive trying to calm my sister down.

"We were just talking" Grace sobbed, on the verge of vomiting

I grew pale with fear and turned to look into my boyfriend's room but Marshall ran out into the hall and tried to stop me. He grabbed me with strong arms and dragged me a few feet away from the door before I was able to unclasp his hands from my stomach and run free. I fell into Ricky's doorway and looked up, the sight before me placing me in a disturbed trance. Ricky was sprawled out on the bed, moving up and down as if having a seizure. Blood covered his white v-neck t-shirt and splattered his sheets in various places. Three nurses were wrestling him to his mattress as he struggled for air. Eventually, the third nurse to his right was able to strap a mask onto his blood stained face. Ricky's possessed body immediately calmed down and his chest slowly began to rise normally.

"Ricky!" I screamed, suddenly free from my frozen shock. I ran over to my boyfriend's aid. He starred at the ceiling with glassy eyes, taking shallow breaths that sounded like they were escaping the nostril of a kitten. Tears rolled off my colourless face and fell onto Ricky's mask as I loomed over him, stroking his hair.

"It's okay baby," I whispered, knowing he could hear me "I've got you"

Ricky took in a deep breath and shifted his gaze towards me. He slowly lifted his blood stained left hand, which I took hold of tightly and kissed over and over, never wanting to let go. The nurses in the room came in between Ricky and I as they got to work on hooking him up to numerous machines. I sat down in the chair next to Ricky, not daring to let go of his hand in the fear that he might break apart. I watched sadly as the nurses cut off Ricky's soaked shirt and attached wires to both nipples. They connected an IV drip to his hand and withdrew blood from his right forearm. Ricky winced at the stab of the needles and gripped my hand tighter than before. I patted the back of his palm affectionately and smiled as his tense grip disappeared.

"Amy" Marshall mumbled from the doorway "Can I see you for a moment please?"

"I'll be right back," I stated loudly, in Ricky's direction. I let go of his hand by placing it on his chest. He slowly slid it off and let it roll off the side of the hospital bed, allowing his entire arm to hang freely as if he was dead. This was a sign that he didn't want me to go. I had to though. I had to hear what Marshall had to say. What was the reason for all of this?

"What's wrong with him" I demanded, following Grace's step-dad into the hall. I watched Marshall squirm in an uncomfortable silence as he tried to put his diagnosis into words that wouldn't send me into an instant cardiac arrest.

"Ricky's lungs are beginning to deteriorate. We are moving him into the ICU effective immediately."

"Deteriorate" I stuttered "Wh-what does that mean?"

"His lungs are collapsing Amy. He's dying"

Luckily for my sake, I was already standing against a wall because if I hadn't been, surely I would have passed out. Ricky wasn't dying. He couldn't be. I loved him. He loved me. We were happy and he was doing better. He was going home soon. We were going to go out on dates and go dancing. Dying? He couldn't be dying. I had prayed. I had prayed!

"No, no… no. No, no, no!" I rambled, starting to cry

"Amy –" Marshall interjected

"NO!" I screamed, cutting him off. I slammed my fists into his chest "He isn't dying! You're lying! Stop lying to me!" I was hysterical. I kept flinging myself towards him as if every punch was some kind of portal bringing Ricky back to me. Marshall stood there wincing as I hit him. Tears ran down my face and soaked the neckline of my shirt. Snot drizzled out of my nose and onto my top lip. I couldn't stop myself. When he had had enough, Marshall grabbed me by the biceps and shook me until I starred at him bewildered and afraid.

"Dam it Amy stop it!" He screamed, "There's nothing I can do! There is nothing any of us can do!"

"There has to be something we can do," I whispered, starring behind him at nothing in particular. I slid down to the floor and curled up into a ball leaning against the corner of the wall.

"Our only hope is a sudden organ donation, and judging by his condition, I say he has about one week to live at most. It could be a couple of hours; it could even be a few more months. I just don't know. He could improve drastically and even be removed from the ICU. It all depends"

"But there is a chance he will live?" I asked, grasping onto the little bit of faith I still held in my heart as I stood back up

"Not forever, but for now, yes. There is a chance"

I heard a painful squeaking from behind me as a large gurney rolled out of Ricky's room. His limp body lay there helpless and sick but his eyes flashed all around searching for me. Begging for me. I ran up to his side and kissed his cheek, which had been rubbed clean of those dreaded blood stains.

"I love you" I called after him as he was pushed towards the other end of the floor into the ICU

"So what happens now?" I said turning back towards Marshall, open to any and every opportunity he knew of that would keep my boyfriend alive.

* * *

The next few days went a little something like this. I would wake up in the morning about an hour before I had to leave for school. I would call the hospital to check up on Ricky, making sure he had made it through the night. Marshall had entered me as 'family friend', which meant I was allowed to receive personal information that no one else was. A few times, the nurse on the other end had informed me that they had almost lost him overnight due to another attack but that he was pulling through. It made me glad to hear that he was being strong, not only for his sake but also for mine. I needed him to live. I needed him here.

I remember during my second phone call, the person on the other end of the line wasn't sure if he was going to make it through the day. He hadn't been eating a lot and the mucus he was removing from his lungs was almost unbearable. That was the first time I really broke down and cried when Ricky was in the ICU, not including that day at the hospital. The crushing thought that I was never going to see my boyfriend again ate away at me. I asked the person I was speaking to, to bring the phone to Ricky so I could tell him I loved him. They did as they were told, entered the ICU and held the receiver up to Ricky's ear. I could hear him breathing slightly and knew that was all there really was to him at that time, just shallow breaths and scary thoughts. I told Ricky I loved him and that he was going to see me that afternoon. I made it a promise. I heard a small 'okay' through the phone and smiled at the unconditional strength my boyfriend was displaying.

After that call, I started checking in on my lunch breaks and on the bus rides to the hospital. I would visit Ricky every day for an hour in his room doing simple things like brushing his hair with my fingertips. I would then leave him alone as visiting hours were limited and would sit on the chairs outside his room so he could watch me study. I stayed until 7 every night, fed Ricky his usual and disgusting serving of lentil soup, being the only thing he could stomach, and put him to sleep. I would whisper words of encouragement while stroking his curls and allow myself to cry once I knew his eyes were closed.

This daily routine of constant worry carried on for about two more weeks. Slowly over time, Ricky started improving. He no longer needed an oxygen mask as the simple nostril tube sufficed. He gained enough strength to sit up and his dry coughs returned, sending the mucus and phlegm back where they came from. Things had started looking up and I was hanging onto my hope for dear life.

* * *

On one Saturday in April, Ricky and I were resting in his room. He was scheduled to move out of ICU by Monday, which made me ecstatic. No longer would I need paper surgeon masks to visit my boyfriend. No longer would we be forced into perfect little time slots. I hadn't even thought about it before. To everyone outside the life of a hospital, the hospital itself is a nightmare. To everyone inside ICU, the hospital itself is a blessing.

"What are you thinking about?" Ricky asked, catching me in my daydream

"Nothing" I sighed, taking his hand "I was just thinking about how much my priorities have changed in these last few months. I first came here dreading arts and crafts, concerning myself with what to wear. Now I can't get dressed fast enough because every minute I waste at home is another minute without you"

"I used to think about that a lot when I first got here"

"What happened?" I asked, entwining our fingers together

"I forgot what it was like to have other priorities. This place is my life now. Nothing else" He said acceptingly, gesturing to the walls around him

"What about me?"

"Of course you. You're everything Sweetie. I'd be dead if it wasn't for you"

"You know I prayed?" I said abruptly, lost in thought

"You did? When?"

"The day you were put here. It was right before the…"

"Mother of all coughing fits?"

"Before that. I talked to God and I asked him to …"

"You don't need to tell me Amy. I already know what you asked"

"You do? … How?"

"Because I asked the same things," He said, his voice cracking "And I'm still here, so I figured… whatever you said worked"

"It's not supposed to be like this Ricky" I snarled angrily

"I know it's not Ames. And I'm sorry you are being put through this at such a young age"

"I'm only sorry I wasn't here sooner" I replied, and it was the honest truth. A knock at the door interrupted our conversation.

"Mind if I come in?" Marshall asked softly, not wanting to really disturb us. I figured that whatever it was had to be important, as he knew how special our time together was to me. I nodded my head inviting him in and watched him as he tried to hide a smile.

"What's going on?" Ricky giggled, lying back against his pillows

"I have something for you" Marshall exclaimed, handing Ricky an envelope. Ricky took the small pouch and starred at it, his eyes bugged, his tongue peeking through his lips in excitement.

"What is it?" I asked curiously, watching Ricky carefully un peel the sticky attachment of the card. He removed its contaminants, which was a single slip of paper. It fluttered into his lap and he picked it up gently, reading and re reading it's font.

"It's a… It's the name of that 21 year old that was in that motorcycle crash last month. His parents are taking him off life support tomorrow and he was an organ donor. Amy! I'm getting new lungs!"

* * *

**Follow me on twitter riverbkstar and on Keek - Riverbstar ! Mention you are from Fanfiction and I'll follow you back!**


	7. Ask Me Today And I'll Tell You Tomorrow

**COMING MARCH 2013!**

A NEW STORY BROUGHT TO YOU BY Riverbkstar !

"Red" will be a 5-Shot FutureFic featuring Ricky and Amy like you have never seen before! I cannot wait for you all to read it!

To see the story before the story, please watch the trailer for "Red" and the link below! Comment and Like the video for earlier publication!

watch?v=dZDti-fY_zo

* * *

I lay against Ricky with my head on his chest, both my arms between our bodies to keep warm. As he breathed, my head rose up and down and it felt so good. It felt like life, opportunities and miracles all rolled up in one. As we lied there, barely moving, barely breathing, I began to think back to three days ago where Ricky and I had found out he was about to get saved.

_I sat next to Ricky in disbelief, my mouth wide open. "What!?" I screamed, grabbing the slip of paper away from his small oxygen deprived fingers. I glanced over the note once then read it. I then read it again and again but the words didn't change. This was for real. My boyfriend was going to live! He was really going to be okay!_

"_This is amazing!" Ricky cried, his voice cracking. I knew from experience that whenever Ricky's voice wavered, he was on the verge of tears. I placed the note down gently and told him to come towards me. I kissed his forehead and held his head against my chest._

"_It's all going to be okay," I whispered, soothing him as I rubbed his back "You did it. You did it!"_

"Hey! What are you thinking about?" Ricky questioned, pulling me away from paradise

"I was just re reading that note in my head. I can't believe your surgery is tomorrow" I replied, nuzzling my head deeper into Ricky's shirt. He stroked my bangs affectionately and smiled. Though the room was growing dark as the moon began to rise, I could hear his smile. I loved the sound of his smile.

"Yea, me neither" He mumbled, giving me the strange feeling that he wasn't all too excited about tomorrow and what it had in store. I removed myself from our warm entanglement as stared at him through the dusk of the hospital room. He looked back tiredly and I could tell he was about to fall asleep.

"Remember when you said I could ask you anything I wanted, that first day we met?"

"Well technically it was our second time meeting but yes babe, I do remember… Why?" He said, stifling a yawn

"Does that offer still stand?"

Ricky withdrew a breath and exhaled slowly. He grunted as he struggled to sit up and leaned against his pillows, winded, when he did. He twiddled his thumbs slowly, buying time.

"Ricky!" I ordered, ruining the purposeful silence he was creating

"What do you want to know?" He asked sternly

I grabbed hold of his hands, which were twitching with nervous energy. I held them together and looked deeply into his eyes, which I wasn't even sure he could see amongst the evening haze.

"Are you scared? Scared you're going to die?"

"I don't know" Ricky replied slowly "But I'm really tired. Why don't you ask me tomorrow?"

"Why!" I screamed, jumping off the bed to look directly at Ricky "Why do you always do that!?"

"Do what?" Ricky shouted back

"Every time I ask you if you're scared of dying you tell me to ask you later. Ask you tomorrow because you don't know! You never know! I don't understand why you can't give me a simple straight answer!" I cried, tears strolling down my face. I was good and pissed. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. He was supposed to open up to me. We were a couple. We loved each other. Why was he keeping everything up inside?

Ricky glared at me sadly, his moist eyes glimmering in the moonlight. I waited for him to say something. For him to give me a reason to stay, but he wouldn't. I spun around on the heels of my converse and grabbed my things. I headed towards the door, hearing sobs from behind me grow louder and louder. Just as I was about to walk through the doorway, he said it. Slow and quiet at first, growing louder and stronger each time.

"Amy" He mumbled, watching me leave "Amy! Amyy!"

I stopped dead in my tracks and turned to face him, angrily staring him down from across the room. Ricky looked at me as if he was seeing me for the very last time, his face distorted with pain and sadness. He grunted and peeled away his covers revealing two skinny legs he hadn't walked on in weeks. Slowly but surely he sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of his bed. Ricky carefully lowered himself to the ground and stood straight, placing one hand on the bed to keep him balanced.

"Maybe I never answer you because I don't know where to start!" He yelled, more upset than I had ever seen him "Maybe it hurts too much to think about. It hurts too much to talk about. Im petrified of dying. It absolutely terrifies me but not for the reason you think!"

"Ricky listen" I began, creeping back towards my boyfriend

"No you listen!" He cut me off, shouting louder than ever "I love you! Okay? I said it. I love you! I love you, I love you, I need you! You are … everything to me. And the thought… the thought of not being with you everyday for the rest of my life is horrifying. Im not scared of dying Amy. I'm scared of being without you!"

I approached Ricky, scared and fragile. My heart burned with sorrow and passion as he poured his soul out right in front of me. Admitting his fears only made me love him more. He stood there crying, ranting and screaming. He was out of breath and swung slightly from side to side as if about to pass out. I continued to approach him, my hot tears sliding onto my dry lips. They tasted salty, like blood escaping a cut gum. Ricky looked at me sadly as I took his hand in mine. I stretched my other hand over his neck, placing it at the top of his spine. He growled like a deprived puppy and pulled me into his warm embrace, biting my lower lip with fury.

I pulled his hair in my hands as he feverishly slid his own up and down my shirt, brushing my bra then pulling away as we kissed.

"I need you," He whispered through the heat of the moment. I moved in closer to him and felt a large growth beneath his waist. I looked at him and smiled, my happiness suddenly replaced by worried thoughts. What if I hurt him? What if it this was too much too soon? "Don't worry about me" He reassured, taking my face in his hands "I love you"

I nodded my head quickly and immediately attacked his lips, moaning as he pulled me onto his legs. We collapsed into the bed and I immediately began grinding against him. He moaned in pleasure, taking in deep breaths. I eagerly removed my shirt and my shorts, flinging them onto the closest chair. I helped Ricky remove his own shirt and traced his bony, sickly chest with my finger. Once undressed, Ricky flipped me onto my back, waited for my nod of approval then thrust into me so hard I almost cried.

* * *

We woke up in each other's arms the next morning. The night before had been thrilling! We made love to each other for a short amount of time, as Ricky grew exhausted in just a matter of seconds. It hurt at first, being my first time and his but eventually became like nothing neither one of us had ever felt. We knew it was foolish and irresponsible but both silently agreed that we didn't want any regrets should something go wrong in surgery that day.

"Alright Richard!" An annoying orderly boomed as he hustled into the room, destroying the peace of the morning "Time to get ready!"

I turned my head away from Ricky's shoulder where it currently lay and glared at the hospital employee. He opened the blinds to Ricky's window and placed a gown on the foot of the bed. "I'll be back in five minutes. Get changed okay?" He said before leaving.

I released a sigh of relief and slowly sat up, stretching after the greatest night possible.

"Last night was fun," Ricky purred, sitting up.

"You bet it was" I cooed, leaning over the bed to kiss my man "Do you want help getting changed?"

"No, I can do it. But thank you. Would you mind handing me your cell? I want to call my mom before they take me in"

"Sure thing honey" I replied reaching for my bag. I handed Ricky my cell, which he already knew how to use thanks to many previous phone calls home. I smiled and patted his leg before exiting the room. I walked towards the elevator, took its short ride down to the first floor and strolled towards the cafeteria buzzing with morning patients and staff. I bought a large coffee and a danish and carried them back upstairs.

When I returned to Ricky's room, a large group of orderlies were pricking and poking him to prepare him for surgery. I slid in under the commotion and sat in a chair waiting for them to leave. Eventually the noise calmed and most left, leaving just one to push Ricky out into the hall.

"Your phone is on the window ledge," Ricky wheezed through his mask "Thanks for letting me use it"

"Of course" I smiled, moving to my right to sit next to Ricky on the edge of his bed. The leftover nurse in the room waited patiently in the corner for me to say my goodbyes. I leaned into Ricky, extending my right arm over and behind his shoulder as I brushed his curls with my left hand.

"I'm going to be fine you know" Ricky said confidently

"I know" I choked back, fighting tears.

Ricky looked at me with pity and affection; kissing my forehead "I love you" He whispered powerfully "You know that don't you? I… love… you" I nodded my head unable to speak as those familiar burning hot tears escaped my eyelashes. I kissed the top of Ricky's head gently and wiped my eyes as I stood up. The nurse silently removed the brake of the bed and began to push it forwards. Ricky reached for my hand and brought it to his lips, romantically serenading me one last time until he was wheeled away from me for good.

Soon after Ricky left, my family showed up to the hospital to wait with me and offer support where needed. Grace found me leaning against the wall outside Ricky's room, my shoulders shaking as I cried privately in the corner. She approached me gently and opened her arms wide, tightening her posture as I collapsed into her, allowing myself to break down.

Grace led me into the waiting room where I wearily hugged my mom and dad who sat me down in an aged chair and held my hand. We seemed to wait for hours. I remembered Marshall telling me things would take a while but never really expected how agonizing waiting would be. Ricky's surgery went late into the evening. No one came to update me on Ricky's status which worried me as Marshall had promised he would make sure I was aware of what was going on at all times.

My dad left to get dinner at around six, returning half an hour later with a coffee and sandwich for me. I was so nervous and spent that I barely had an appetite. By 7, my dad was complaining about a kink in his neck and my mom was deeply concerned with how my lack of nutrition for the day was ruining my complexion.

* * *

I woke up at around 8:15 being shaken awake by my mother who claimed I had dozed off about 20 minutes earlier. I yawned and wiped my eyes, wondering why she was disturbing me when out of the corner of my eye I saw Marshall standing across the waiting area, his cap in his hands.

I got up slowly and nervously glanced at my parents as if about to walk into my first day of kindergarten without my mommy's hand to hold. My mom nodded and smiled at me affectionately, convincing me to move forward. I walked over to Marshall and exhaled slowly, hoping to stabilize myself from my sudden dizzy spell.

"It was a rough surgery" Marshall began, speaking slowly through his fatigue "We removed the lung and put him on bypass until the new organ arrived. Luckily it was a perfect fit, but we had some complications and he flat lined about three times. We constantly were using manual sticks to electrocute the heart to maintain a steady pulse. I would have sent someone out to update you but there were so many complications and I didn't want to worry you"

"Is he alright?" I coughed, my head spinning with all the information he was delivering when all I really wanted to know was if he was okay

Marshall took in a deep breath, looking deeply into my eyes "Yes" He huffed "Ricky's fine. He is going to be okay"

I smiled with relief and clapped my hands together, letting the tears fall. I graciously looked up at the ceiling and silently thanked God for performing this miracle. I glanced back at Marshall and without thinking, wrapped myself around his waste, resting my head on his toned chest.

"I love you dad" I whispered, breaking away "You may not be my real dad and I know I have never said it before but I mean it. I love you. Thank you for saving him"

"I may have saved his life Amy, but you are the one who saved him" Marshall said, patting my shoulder "And I love you too"

I watched Marshall walk away from the waiting room towards the closest staircase and turned to face my family, excited to tell them the good news. We sat down in great spirits, fully aware and grateful that the worst was over. All we had to do now was wait.

* * *

**Follow me on twitter riverbkstar and on Keek - Riverbstar ! Mention you are from Fanfiction and I'll follow you back!**


	8. Without All The White

**COMING MARCH 2013!**

A NEW STORY BROUGHT TO YOU BY Riverbkstar !

"Red" will be a 5-Shot FutureFic featuring Ricky and Amy like you have never seen before! I cannot wait for you all to read it!

To see the story before the story, please watch the trailer for "Red" at the link below! Comment and Like the video for earlier publication!

watch?v=dZDti-fY_zo

* * *

I stood in the claustrophobic hospital elevator gripping its chrome railing and watched the small screen next to the large mechanical door count off floors as I rose.

The familiar chime of the timer announced my arrival to the third floor. I removed my now contracted, sweaty palm off of the railing, leaving behind five noticeable finger prints and hooked my right hand onto the handle of my purse, pressed tightly to my side as it hung off my right shoulder. I smiled politely at the orderly dressed in blue scrubs standing behind me and stepped firmly onto sturdy ground.

I shuddered as I exited the steel cage and made my way through the abnormally busy hallway that led to my boyfriend's room. I knocked on his grey door for what I believed to be the last time and scarcely pushed it open about halfway. Ricky stood next to his window, deep in thought and turned for a brief moment to look in my direction.

"Hey" he mumbled softly, lost in whatever he was thinking about

I pursed my lips in a curious disappointment and entered the room, removing my purse from my shoulder and onto the foot of his bed. I gently ran my hand over the yellow blanket folded and perched on the edge of the mattress ready to leave. I smiled to myself thoughtfully and admired the silence of the room just one more time before strolling over to Ricky and wrapping myself around him from behind. "How are we today?" I whispered, my chin resting on his left shoulder

"Fine I guess" he replied, not showing the least bit of interest in my presence "I'm just..."

I closed my eyes, enjoying the moment "Just what sweetie?"

Ricky turned into me and used his right hand to push back some thin bangs falling from behind my ear "I've been waiting for today for what seems like forever. And now that it's finally here, I don't know if I'm ready"

I listened attentively to what my boyfriend had to say, and gave him a warm reassuring smile before pecking him on the lips to offer comfort "You are going to be fine Ricky. I know going home and leaving this hospital for good is scary. It would be for anyone. But you did it. You survived a lung transplant and four years of Cystic Fibrosis. Things are finally going to go the way they are supposed to"

"You really think so?" He asked weakly, moving away from me to sit on the edge of his bed next to the window

I followed him and sat down, taking his hand in mine "I know so"

"Thank you Amy. That means a lot" Ricky bowed his head and lustfully starred at our entwined fingers "I love you"

"I love you too Ricky" I said, hiding my huge grin as he leaned in to kiss me. His tongue prodded mine and he moaned with pleasure, letting go of my hand as he moved his up to my face and caressed my cheek with his thumb. I resisted his weight and pushed against him, my own hands instinctively flying up to grab his sexy curls. This was neither the time or the place, but we just couldn't help ourselves. I wanted him so badly!

An annoying tapping noise from somewhere in the room pulled us out of our fantasy. I strained my neck turning to my right side where I found Grace in the doorway of the bedroom, knocking. "Grace!" I shouted, pushing Ricky away from me. I shot up from the bed and embarrassingly buttoned the top of my cardigan that Ricky had pried open "What are you doing here?"

"I came to wish Ricky good luck. Dad said he was getting discharged today"

"Yea well dad has a big mouth" I mumbled, snatching my purse away from Ricky as he fiddled with its zipper

"Hi Grace" Ricky waved, as he scooted back up to the head of the bed to pull on the sneakers that sat on his nightstand

"Hi Ricky!" Chirped my sister as she entered the room "I just wanted to stop by and tell you how happy I am for you and that I hope you enjoy your time at home"

"Thank you. I'm sure I will. And I'm sure I'll be seeing you around"

"Absolutely!" Grace chimed, flipping her focus to me "Ames, I didn't even know you were here, but since you are... how does a ride home with Marshall and me sound?"

"Yea it sounds fine. Thanks Grace" I muttered, grabbing her wrist as I pulled her towards the door. I turned towards my boyfriend who was pulling on his second sneaker "I'm sorry I couldn't stay longer but now that I think about it, its supposed to rain later..."

"And I know how much you hate thunderstorms. No worries Babe. I'll text you my mom's address once I get home and you can come over for dinner tonight like we planned"

"I'm looking forward to it" I said before gently waving and chasing my sister out into the hallway. I flung my arms out vertically is disgust and screamed her name "What was that about?"

"What was what about?" She said innocently "I just came to congratulate him. How did I know you two were making out?"

"Don't start with that!" I ordered "We love each other. We can make out if we want to. And wait... go back to the part about you wanting to congratulate him. You wished him luck in there. You didn't congratulate him"

"I said too much already" Grace pleaded "But you should know that Ricky meant to tell you before telling me. But it slipped out the other day when I was visiting"

"Wait Grace" I commanded, stopping dead in my tracks to grab her wrist again and pull her next to me "What slipped out?"

"You aren't mad that he told me first are you? I mean a scholarship miles away at Stanford is usually something you tell your girlfriend first before her sister but he was just so excited. I'm sure you were too when he told you!"

I starred at my sister blankly for a moment, my mouth running dry "No..." I falsely and painfully reassured her "I'm not mad. Don't worry about it"

"Great! Well we had better get going before dad gets mad we were away so long!"

That evening, I followed the directions Ricky had sent me exactly as written. For the first time since getting my license, my dad lent me the car and allowed me to drive to Ricky's house all by myself. I had scribbled out the address Ricky texted me onto a small sheet of scrap paper I ripped out of a notebook in the kitchen drawer. Now I sat in my family's mini van, parked in an unfamiliar driveway in an unfamiliar neighborhood outside an unfamiliar house. Not only was this the house of my miracle boyfriend, but the house where I would be, in just a few minutes, meeting his mom for the first time.

I exhaled slowly and removed the key from the car's ignition along with the glasses I used when driving. I placed both in my purse and hooked the bag around my shoulder before popping the handle that opened the door. I stepped out onto the asphalt driveway and locked the van before shutting the door with a loud slam. Wincing, I crept towards the front of the house and took in another deep breath before knocking on the glass window of the front door.

I heard some light pounding from inside the house and casually turned my head all around the porch, admiring its view and structure. Finally, the door opened with a sharp click of its lock and Ricky appeared, happier than I had ever seen him.

"Amy!" He cried "You made it!"

"I made it!" I cheered sarcastically, stepping into the front hallway of Ricky's home as he moved to the side so that I could enter.

"Did you find the place okay?"

"Yea. Your directions were spot on. Thanks" I said, handing the sweater I was wearing over my pink t-shirt to Ricky

"No problem babe" He replied, hanging the sweater on a hanger in the front closet before sliding its door shut and leaning in to kiss me "I missed you"

"Same here. How does it feel to be out of that small hospital room?"

"Only fantastic!" He enthused, walking slowly into the living room. It was obvious he still hadn't gained all of his strength "It's a little weird though. I've seen nothing but white walls and sheets for almost a year. Now I'm back home and it just... it feels great"

"I'm happy for you Ricky" I said, hugging my boyfriend "I really am"

Ricky smirked and took my hand as he lowered himself onto the burgundy leather sofa that sat in the small living room across from the flat screen TV. "It was great coming home. My mom got off work for the day, picked me up right after you left and we went out for lunch. Then we drove back here and she gave me a set of keys to my old truck. She had to sell it a while back after my collapse in September to pay for some bills. But with her working overtime, she was able to buy it back."

"You never told me that Ricky" I said, patting his hand "That's fantastic. Speaking of your mother... where is she?"

"Outside barbecuing. I was waiting for you to bring her up. Would you like to meet her?"

"Of course!" I exclaimed, super excited yet extremely nervous.

This time, Ricky patted my hand and stood up from our spot on the couch. He strutted over to the doorway that led to the main hall of the bungalow and stopped when he realized I wasn't following "What's wrong?" He asked, taking a small step back towards me

"Nothing..." I lied "I guess I'm just..."

"Nervous?"

"How did you know?" My head hung low

"Don't be Ames!" Ricky reassured, rushing towards me "She is going to love you! Come on. Let me show her what a great girl I've got here. She can't wait to meet you"

Reluctantly, I agreed and took Ricky's hand as he carefully led me through his home, pointing me in the direction of the bathroom, his bedroom and the basement. We rolled into the kitchen where the back door was left open slightly, revealing the sight of a larger, darker woman cooking hamburgers on the grill outside on their patio.

She glanced in our direction and immediately closed the lid of the barbecue, let go of her utensils and flew into the house. "You must be Amy!" She exclaimed, coming towards me with open arms "It is so wonderful to meet you!"

I reciprocated her hug before letting go as she pulled away to stare at me. Her smile took up half of her face and before I could even tell her how happy I was to meet her, she started to cry and pulled me in for another hug "Thank you for standing by my son for so long Amy. I can't thank you enough"

My lips twitched. How was I supposed to respond to that? There weren't enough words to describe how amazing Ricky was. Why wouldn't I want to stand by him? He was everything to me. "Don't even mention it Ma'am. Your son is amazing" I replied, pulling away to mischievously glance in my boyfriend's direction. He blushed shyly back, mouthing the words 'I love you'.

Ricky's mother clasped her hands together in either embarrassment or joy "Oh I know honey! But Amy, Please. Call me Margaret"

"Margaret" I repeated, nodding my head

"Great" Ricky interrupted, moving to my side as he slid his arm around my back "Now that we are all acquainted, lets eat!"

Margaret jumped into action, sprinting out the door towards the barbecue as she piled a plate high with hamburgers and sausages. Ricky untied a bag of buns and stacked them onto an even larger platter before placing it in the center of the table. I sat down next to him and pulled a hamburger bun onto my plate along with a handful of fries from a pan next to the salad bowl. Soon, Ricky's mother joined us and dove right into conversation.

She asked us about our first date and what our plans were now that Ricky was out of the hospital. Between mouthfuls, I answered as honestly as possible. Margaret was really easy to talk to and was super friendly. I found comfort in her attitude, knowing that even if I wasn't around, Ricky would have an amazing person taking care of him. For dessert, we each had an ice cream sandwich and ate the delicate treats in lawn chairs out in Margaret's small backyard. It had a tiny stone patio with a black barbecue and round glass table that seated two. It was 10 feet wide and 10 feet long. Around the edges of its wooden fence sat a gorgeous vegetable garden sprouting tomatoes.

Ricky walked me to the door at around 8:15 after Margaret had bid me a huge hug goodbye, thanking me once again for being apart of Ricky's life. He took me in his arms and passionately kissed me, pulling away to whisper in my ear that he had wanted to do that all night. I laughed and took him in for another kiss "Me too" I purred, brushing my hands over his torso.

"I wanted to ask you something" Ricky announced, as he opened the front door and led me onto the porch where I immediately noticed the difference between Ricky's cool home and the hot air outside "We never really got the chance to have a real first date. That dinner that day got cut short by my attack and I really want to make it up to you"

"Babe" I said, pushing come curls away from his forehead "You don't need to do that"

"But I want to Amy... I want to. How does next Saturday sound?"

"Perfect!" I enthused, dragging Ricky in for one last kiss before breaking away to my car.

* * *

**Follow me on twitter riverbkstar and on Keek - Riverbstar ! Mention you are from Fanfiction and I'll follow you back!**


	9. Now We Dance

**COMING MARCH 2013!**

A NEW STORY BROUGHT TO YOU BY Riverbkstar !

"Red" will be a 5-Shot FutureFic featuring Ricky and Amy like you have never seen before! I cannot wait for you all to read it!

To see the story before the story, please watch the trailer for "Red" at the link below! Comment and Like the video for earlier publication!

watch?v=dZDti-fY_zo

* * *

The following Saturday afternoon, I stood in my shower under the warm spray of the shower head and indulged myself in its therapeutic warmth. I worked my finger tips through my hair, thick with lavender shampoo and instinctively massaged my scalp as I closed my eyes and washed the past week's stress away. I had one more month of school left before I was officially a graduate and school was getting insane! I was still reeling from all the class time I had missed when Ricky was in the ICU and exams were fast approaching. Worried I was in potential danger of losing my scholarship, I was working extra hard which meant a lot less time with Ricky who was resting comfortably at home.

All morning I had worked incredibly hard to secure myself a good two hours to get ready for my first date with Ricky. Last week, Grace had mentioned some sort of scholarship Ricky had acquired, based on acceptance to Stanford for what I assumed was baseball and at a school I didn't even know he had been considering. I wasn't even aware he was considering college. I had expected him to bring it up at dinner with his mother the week before but again, none of them had mentioned anything about it. Starting to doubt my sanity after already dubbing my sister insane, I realistically assumed that Ricky was most likely going to bring it up that night at dinner.

I stepped back underneath the continuous stream of shower water and tilted my head back to the point where the water reached my hairline. I hummed the tune of _One Thing_ by One Direction [ which had been relentlessly playing on my radio station all weekend ] as I ran the 2 in 1 Shampoo and Conditioner out of my hair. I slammed down the tiny plug that controlled the release of water from the shower head with the palm of my hand and switched the nob from _hot wate_r to _off_.

I leaned back to pull my towel from the rack that held the plastic shower curtain and wrapped the faded pink fabric around my upper body where it ran down my cold and wet core to the middle of my thighs. Perfect. I carefully stepped out of the slippery tub and onto a separate, thicker towel I had laid out on the ground before hand. I immediately turned the bathroom fan on and began to shiver under its cool pull.

As I toweled myself down and changed into my strapless black bra and panties, I smiled at the thought of what tonight was going to be like. I had never seen Ricky outside of the usual hospital gown or jeans and t shirt. Even when he had been discharged the week before, he had been wearing denim jeans and a grey v-neck.

I ferociously attacked the birds nest that had formed at the top of my head, moaning and grunting as I ripped away the knots into clean beautiful strands. I tousled my hair with my towel before checking my phone for the time. I always forgot that warm showers cause condensation and had to wipe a wet film of fog off of my screen.

* * *

It was 6:33. Ricky was scheduled to be here waiting for me at seven. I had to hurry! I fiercely unlocked the bathroom door, taking a deep breath of fresh cool air as I did so. I flipped my now damp towel onto the rack hanging on the wall, grabbed my comb from the counter and took off for my bedroom, sprinting through the hallway scared someone would see and scold me for being half naked. Once behind the safety of my closed wooden door, I set to work on finding the _perfect_ outfit. I scanned the clothes hanging in my closet once, then twice. Constantly flipping from outfit to outfit. Flip, scan, debate, flip. Etc. Etc. It wasn't until I was 3/4 of my way through the clothes I wore every day that I realized my closet just wasn't going to cut it.

I pulled on my pink silk robe hanging off the back of the chair tucked neatly under my desk and crept into Grace's room. With her being away half of the time, my mom kept our _special occasion_ clothes in a section of her closet. My mom's understanding of a _special occasion _consisted of weddings of strangers, graduations of distant cousins or religious ceremonies of weird friends. We never went to church like Grace's family so my time with my _special_ clothing was quite limited. Knowing my mom would not approve of my asking to wear the black strapless gown hidden in the dusty corner of Grace's closet, I decided not to tell her what I was going to wear. If she did notice (which was highly likely with her being my overbearing, overprotective mother) It would simply be too late to change.

Once dressed, I blowed and straightened my hair until it had a slight wave to it. I had always hated having my hair anything but pin straight to perfection until Ricky had told me to keep it as natural as possible. He said it made me look more confident and that the slight wave framed my face. Being a teenage girl, totally self conscious of her appearance, I took his advice and stopped burning my hair to a crisp every morning.

When I was for once satisfied with my look, I removed my evening bag from my dresser and placed my phone inside along with 20 dollars, a lip gloss, some mints and a birth control pill that I had finally remembered to start taking. About a month before Ricky's surgery, my mom had taken me to our family doctor asking for some pills. I hadn't refused them at the time because I thought it was the coolest thing ever, to actually be trusted that much by an adult. And not just any adult, but my own mother. I had thought it ironic at the time because I didn't expect me and Ricky to sleep together for months or maybe even ever. After his surgery (which at this point had been about 3 weeks ago) I had finally remembered to start taking the pills again after being so side tracked with Ricky's illness.

I ran to the door with 2 and a half minutes to spare. Fortunate for me, Ricky was already waiting. Unfortunate for him. I fixed my hair one last time as I puckered my glossy lips in the front hallway mirror. Perfect. Regaining my balance in my heels so that I wouldn't eradicate myself, I peeled open the front door and stepped out onto the porch, yelling into the house behind me that I was leaving. I grinned at the sight of Ricky behind the wheel of his recently acquired truck. He lit up when he saw me, reminding me of all those times I had come to visit him in the hospital, and he slid out of the drivers side, running to open my door.

"After you My Lady" He bowed, opening the car door with his right hand as his left was tucked in at his waist in a curtsy.

"Thank you Sir" I said, playing along as I eased my way into the tall vehicle. Once positive I was inside, Ricky who was dressed in a delicious brand new grey suit, shut my door and jogged back over to his side. He hopped into the driver's seat, kissed me hello and pushed the gears into drive.

"I really missed you this week" I beckoned over the roaring wind running through both open windows. The air was strong and cool and felt like flames licking at my face as Ricky raced across the open road.

"I'm so happy we're together now!" He enthused, removing his right hand from the wheel to pat my thigh "I've been so bored at home without you!"

"Well luckily, its just a few more weeks until summer!" I replied, raising my voice so Ricky could here me as he gunned the truck to change lanes

He glanced at me quickly in confusion, as he focused his attention on avoiding some Nissan who was cutting him off "What?" he yelled

"Nevermind!" I rolled my eyes and turned my head to look out the window. Stupid drivers. It must be the heat I thought, recollecting a time where Ricky explained that his car was used and that the A/C was broken. Neither him or his mother had the budget to fix it which explained why the windows were open all the way, making it incredibly difficult to hear each other over the noise pollution of the freeway "Where are we going anyways?" I called back, suddenly aware that I didn't have a clue as to where we were going

"You'll see!" Ricky chirped, changing lanes once again to exit the busy highway. He turned onto a nearby side road and avoiding several pot holes, entered the parking lot of a strip mall. He turned off his engine and snickered at the sight of me wrinkling my brows in suspicion.

"The mall?" I sputtered, shooting Ricky _that _look

"Come on" Ricky whispered, unbuckling his seat belt to shift closer to me. He kissed my forehead "Give me some credit here. Have I ever let you down?"

I bit my lip as he coiled a free strand of my hair around his middle finger "No" I answered shyly

"Have a little faith" Ricky encouraged, sinking back in his seat to exit the truck. He patted the hood of his car as he swung around to open my door once again. Such a gentleman, I thought as I stepped onto the deteriorated pavement, wrapping myself around Ricky's extended left forearm

"All I do is have faith" I mumbled, so quietly that it was barely audible

Ricky stopped mid-step and turned towards me sharply. He starred deeply into my eyes for a brief moment and firmly kissed the top of my head "And I love you for it". He led me through the parking lot until we were safely on the sidewalk that surrounded the large outdoor mall and removed his arm from my grasp. He then took hold of my left hand and patted the top of it sweetly as we continued to walk.

We entered through the strip mall's main entrance. in the middle was a large rink used for rollerblading in the summer months and for ice skating in the winter. Around the rink was a large walkway that held about 50 different stores and restaurants. I had come here often as a child and often wondered about myself as a grown up, one day granting my own children the freedom to roam the stores as they wished.

We walked around the entire mall once in a time span of approximately 25 minutes before arriving outside of an expensive restaurant that has near to the entrance we had come through "I didn't want to give it away" Ricky implied, grinning as I gazed the neon sign of the restaurant, its amber glow illuminating both our faces with a red hazy glow

"Ricky!" I coughed, letting go of him to frantically squeeze my hands around my neck "This place is really expensive!"

"I know that" He pleaded, bending his knees to meet me at eye level "but this is our first date and I want it to be special. We won't get dessert, how about that!"

"Ricky - I don't know what to say. We don't need to eat here, we can eat somewhere else. Don't worry about it!"

"I'm not worried about it. And say you'll stay and have dinner with me. I already booked the reservation"

Once we were seated at our booth in the back corner of the restaurant [ which had taken much more pleading and begging than should have been required to sit me down ] we received our menus from our waiter. I ordered a plate of penne pasta in a pesto sauce while Ricky ordered greek salad as he was still recovering and required a strict diet.

"How is the pasta?" Ricky asked while dissecting a seed from its olive

With my mouthful, I casually stacked a few noodles onto the prongs of my fork and shook it above my plate allowing excess drops of sauce to drip before bringing my hand underneath it to offer it to my boyfriend "Its great actually. You want to try some?"

He leaned into the table and opened his mouth wide to take the food in his mouth. Moving back, he closed his mouth tightly and chewed, swallowing and taking a sip of his lemon water "Not bad... Maybe when we come here again sometime, I'll be off this nutrition binge and I can order something like that"

"You don't like your salad?" I asked, taking a roll from the bread basket in the center of our table

"No I do" Ricky wavered, his voice distant. I turned to look at him, and noticed he was distracted by a commotion near the center of the restaurant

"Seriously Ricky?" I snarled, dropping my fork and wincing as its cold metal hit my ceramic plate "What are you looking at?"

"Hmm?" He said, spinning back an entire 180 degrees to look at me "Its nothing. Its just that they had music coming from the speakers in the ceiling"

"And?" It was only like my boyfriend to notice these things. He seriously had to get out more

"And now the pianist is taking over"

"So?" I was so confused

"So... they are opening the dance floor!"

"Oh no Ricky!" I remarked, tossing my hands in the air to defend myself "We are not dancing. Not in your condition. Un-uh"

"Ames!" He whined, standing up. This did not look good. "You'll dance with me in a hospital when I'm wearing scrubs and a stethoscope but you won't dance with me the one time I have enough energy to do so?"

"You're so dam cute" I scowled, laying my head in my hands "Fine!"

Ricky made a fist with his right hand in excitement and thrust it in the air in victory. He helped me up and escorted me out onto the pale wooden floor where four couples out on dates already stood. Gently yet passionately, Ricky swept me up inside of his, both arms draped down my back as I leaned against his now toned chest.

"I missed this" He whispered into my neck so softly that only I would hear

"Me too. I am so glad you are okay"

"I have you to thank" he choked, sounding as if a painful lump had formed in his throat

"Just promise me you're here to stay"

"Cross my heart and hope to -"

"Don't say it" I ordered, cutting him off as I pulled myself deeper into his warmth against my frail body "Just dance"

He turned us slowly, leaning side to side as we swayed to the piano together in unison "You know I didn't bring you here just for a date and a dance Amy. I have some great news and I wanted to wait until the right time to tell you!"

This was it I thought! I knew Ricky was planning on telling me! Finally, the truth about his scholarship would be out in the open and we could discuss our options together! I was so excited, I could hardly stand it. "What? What? What?" I rambled eagerly, pulling out to look ricky in the eyes. I wanted to see his expression when he told me.

He tried to hide his smile "Well it has to do with baseball..."

"Anddd?" I chimed, swinging our arms side to side in anticipation

"And... I got a job!"

A JOB! I knew it! I knew he would tell me! I knew he wasn't holding out! Take that Grace! - Wait! _A Job? _Grace hadn't mentioned that! Maybe it was because he hadn't mentioned it to her? Which meant! *GASP* He still wasn't going to tell me about his scholarship! That little bugger!

"A- A job?" I stammered, my face growing pale, my arms stopping their swinging, my feet going numb. Dam his lies! Dam Dam! "Where? What? A job? Wow! That's great Ricky!" I falsely enthused, mostly from shock and went in to kiss him

"Don't get excited just yet Babe!" He pushed me back. There was obviously more to this story "The job is... wait for it because you are going to love it! The job is.. coaching the senior boys baseball team at Grant!"

Grant! Wait - That was my school! NO WAY! "My school?" I screamed, my eyes widening in excitement. This was unbelievably amazing! This was so amazing it couldn't be possible! "Ricky.. this- this- is..."

"I know!" He exclaimed, grabbing me for a hug. He squeezed me so hard, I could barely breathe. It felt just right. I rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes, smiling as he breathed down my neck "I love you Amy!"

"I love you too Ricky" We pulled away "So when do you start?"

"Monday! They felt that with only a month left, and the season having started only two weeks ago, they want me in right away! I was thinking I could pick you up early on monday and we could go for breakfast then head to school"

"It sounds Amazing Ricky" I grinned sincerely. A job coaching baseball at my school? What could be any better? So what if he wasn't mentioning the scholarship. He would eventually. Right?

* * *

**Follow me on twitter riverbkstar and on Keek - Riverbstar ! Mention you are from Fanfiction and I'll follow you back!**


	10. Happy Days

"Do you have any idea as to what you are going to order?" My conflicted boyfriend Ricky asked from his stiff stance next to me. We were in line for breakfast at Ikea, upstairs in the cafeteria where it seemed as though the entire town had come to join us for eggs and sausage. With a hungry group of about four or five people still ahead of us, I nervously checked my phone for what was probably the hundredth time that morning.

It was already 7:33 and school started at 8:30. I figured that by the time we got our food, settled in to eat, finished and got in the car, we would have only ten minutes to spare before officially being deemed late for class. Not only did today mark four more weeks of high school for me, but it was also Ricky's first day coaching baseball at my school. He seemed to be extremely excited. OR at least he claimed that he was. His eyes said differently. Neither one of us had to say it to know that it was true. Ricky hadn't stepped foot on the field since before his attack last September and deep down I was silently praying that nothing would go wrong. Both of us were.

"It's 7:33" I retorted, pushing my cell back into the front pocket of my purse

"We'll have time" Ricky replied, scanning the menus hanging overhead as if searching for a delayed flight notice "So do you know or don't you?" He stood on his tippy toes and squinted his eyes "I can't make out number six"

"Ricky! They changed the menus since you were last here. Breakfast is a standard eggs, sausage and hash browns. Anything extra is in that self serve island over there" I said pointing "But I think we should just get you some fruit. I don't think an unhealthy breakfast is good for you if you are going to be outside on you feet all day"

Ricky peeled his eyes away from the fresh rack of muffins cooling near the pancakes, and wrapped his arm around my back "I think an unhealthy breakfast is exactly what I need if I am going to be outside all day. And you know what else I think?"

"What?"

He tapped my nose a couple times with the tip of his finger "I think you need to stop worrying so much"

"I can't help it" I said, snuggling into his chest as we shuffled forward in line "I love you too much"

"And I love you Ames. But you heard what Marshall said. I'm allowed to play ball again. And I'm free to eat what I want and when I want"

"I know, I know. And I'm happy you are off restrictions. Just promise me you will take it easy okay?"

"Cross my heart and hope to live" He said smiling, angling his head to kiss me. I reciprocated, pleased that he'd used the modified version of that line instead of the real one. Knowing how much the original saying bothered me, Ricky had finally agreed to change it to something else, despite the fact that he thought I was being totally superstitious. I didn't care though. When it came to Ricky and his health, nothing was too crazy for me.

A chubby russian woman in a white coat and hairnet commanded our attention from behind the glass display. Ricky handed me a tray and grabbed two orange juices from the neighbouring refrigerated case as I placed an order for two breakfasts against my better judgement. Once served, Ricky dipped to collect the tray and carefully ( and awkwardly ) carried it to the closest cash register where I paid 6 dollars and 53 cents.

I led Ricky to an empty table next to a wonderfully large window. [The largest one in the entire dining room]. He expelled a loud breath of air as he slid the food onto the table and plopped down in his seat across from me.

I distributed the cutlery I had picked up at the cash and uncapped the lid to my juice bottle as I pulled in my chair, my eyes twinkling at the sight of my boyfriend already fully engrossed in his meal. "Good huh?" I gestured, shovelling a forkful of eggs into my mouth, still subconsciously concerned with getting to school on time

Ricky nodded his head and grunted, swishing some juice around his mouth before swallowing. "Mhmm. I'm just really glad I get to be here with you on such an amazing morning. The perfect start to what will hopefully be the perfect day"

"I couldn't agree more" I replied, grabbing his hand as it laid palm up on the edge of the table. He smirked before again devoting himself to his breakfast until there was nothing left on his plate. Once we finished eating (at 8:06 by the way) we delivered our trays to the rack outside of the kitchen and cut through the shortcuts on the first floor, purposefully avoiding its long and treacherous maze created by those silly blue arrows.

Ricky hopped into the front seat of his truck, waited for the assuring click of my seatbelt and tore out of the parking lot. Normally, I would have ordered him to slow down but with only 20 minutes until the bell and a 17 minute car ride, I was beginning to worry.

* * *

Ricky had been right when he confidently predicted back in line that we would have enough time. We arrived at school at 8:21. Not only on time but with 9 minutes to spare. Luckily, I had all my books with me after a stressful load of homework the night before and didn't need to go to my locker.

Stepping out of the truck with my enormous textbooks pressed firmly against my chest, I noticed Ricky circling around to collect me. He locked the truck from my side and slipped his left hand into my right, pulling on a flimsy red ball cap that was tucked into the back pocket of his jeans.

"You didn't bring any equipment with you?" I asked as we strolled towards the large building away from the car

"No I did" Ricky replied, as he ran his free hand over the top of his cap resting comfortably on his head "But I don't think I'll need it. Even if I do, I can just run out and get it"

"Remember what I said about taking it easy" I warned, as we stepped up onto the curb of the courtyard leading into my school

Ricky let go of my hand and jumped in front of me, stopping me in my path so that he could wrap is arms around my waist, caging me in for a kiss goodbye "Yes Ma'am" he pecked my forehead "Meet me at my truck for lunch okay. 11:30 sound good?"

"Ricky" I whispered, my face felt as if it was on fire, my hair stood on edge for I had suddenly noticed all the kids passing by. Each and everyone of them starring and snickering. "People are starring" I mumbled, lowering my face. _What was this?_

"Let them stare" he retorted, granting me mercy as he pulled away, aware I wasn't in the mood to _really _kiss him goodbye "11:30 okay?"

"Yea It's fine. I'll see you then" I turned and walked away, flipping my bangs back in frustration the way i always did whenever upset. Ricky loved teasing me about it. I looked behind me once more before entering through the main doors. Ricky still stood where I had left him, affectionately watching me to make sure I made it inside. He smiled and waved goodbye then pointed to his right into the direction of the gym. I bit my lip and nodded, eyeing my boyfriend as he walked away. Silently praying that that wouldn't be the last time I'd see him.

* * *

I made it into my first class just before the bell, still early enough to breath in the evil glare from my homeroom teacher who hated it when people came late. 80 minutes later, I took in a sigh of relief as I joined the congested mess of teenagers out in the hallway and shuffled to my locker at the end of the hall. One period down, three to go. I hadn't heard ambulance sirens or my name called on the P.A system which meant that whatever Ricky was doing, he was doing it well.

I buried my head inside of my locker to search for my Chemistry review sheet and felt a strong poke on my right shoulder. Grace. I stepped out of the claustrophobic locker and glared at my half-sister as she spun the dial of her own locker, alphabetically placed right next to mine.

"You didn't tell me that Ricky was the new gym teacher. You just said he was the new baseball coach" She said out of the corner of her eye

"I didn't tell you because he isn't. He is just doing baseball" I replied, slamming my locker shut. Chemistry could fuck it.

"Nu-uh.I have gym first period and Ricky was just my teacher"

Boy did this catch my attention "Well maybe it was just a fluke. He was probably covering for someone"

"Nope. I asked him. Not only is he the new coach but he is also the newest male gym teacher"

"Forever?"

"As far as I know" She admitted, closing her locker to walk me up the hall

"Wait - You are in an all girls class... Girls the same age as..."

"As Ricky" She said, finishing my sentence "I know. And I think you need to talk to him. Some of his new 'students' I think are finding it appropriate to get 'extra credit' if you know what I mean"

"I know what you mean" I mumbled "And I'm going to kill him!"

Grace shot me a look of disgust "Seriously Amy! You have been an emotional wreck lately. Calm your hormones girl - its no big deal. You know Ricky is cool and you know how much he cares about you. Just talk it over with him at lunch and try not to strangle him while doing so!" The bell signalling the start of second period rang "I have to go. See you at home tonight?"

"Yea... Wait! I thought you were at your mom's tonight!"

"Change of plans!" She called, sprinting down the hall to what I assumed was biology; her favourite class.

As much as I desperately wanted to race off to the gym and see for myself all of the whores throwing themselves at my boyfriend, I decided to wait until lunch. I trotted up the closest staircase to the second floor and took a left towards english where I was deemed late and handed a detention slip for tomorrow afternoon. _Perfect_.

After a horrifying pop quiz and with a massive headache brewing, I brought myself back down to my locker, excited to be half way through the day and ready for what I expected to be a peaceful lunch hour with Ricky. I stacked the morning's binders on the top shelf of my locker and grabbed a 20 from my purse. From behind me, I heard my name being anxiously called over and over again.

I retreated from behind my locker and twisted my neck to roll my eyes at the sight of my always peppy and never calm best friend; Madison. She jumped into place next to me, a big grin on her face. Madison and I had been friends since grade three. She had short red hair that she cut every two years and donated to kids with cancer. Madison was always happy, which was one of the reasons we got along so well. She brought out the best in me, as I was well known for my cranky snarls and depressed expressions. She claimed her goal in life was to put a smile on my face, which hardly ever happened... until I met Ricky of course.

"So is he here yet?" she cried, the excitement practically cracking her voice. She had heard so much about Ricky and yet had never met him. Back in the hospital, I never got the chance. I had prepared to arrange a visit after that day in the chapel but after Ricky's attack, my friends didn't seem that important. Now that he was okay though, it was a different story.

"Yes. We came to school together. Where were you before homeroom? I was looking for you"

"Vocals practice. We have our final competition coming up on friday"

"Oh yea. I remember you mentioning something about that. Sorry, It's been an awful day"

"Even with Ricky being here?"

"Especially with Ricky being here. Not only is he coaching baseball but he is apparently the new gym teacher. Grace said girls were practically throwing themselves at him!"

"I'm sure that can't be true... Of course I wouldn't know how likely these things are because I still haven't met him yet. The love of your life is here at our high school and me, your best friend still fails to be introduced"

I slammed my locker closed and re-juggled my binder in my arms "Would you calm down Madi? He's out at the truck right now... or at least he should be"

"So can I?" She pleaded, her legs starting to twitch with joy and excitement

"Come on"

We made our way out through the front doors of the school, squinting through the bright light of the early afternoon in search of Ricky's blue truck. Walking down the long aisle Ricky and I had parked in, I stopped dead in my tracks, a wave of nausea running through me at the sight of not one, but 5 girls, draped over the sides of Ricky's truck as he sat on the edge of its trunk.

"This doesn't seem like a good time for introductions" Madison whispered into my ear "I'm going to go find... someone... to eat with instead. If that's okay"

Lost in the conversation between Ricky and his hookers, I waved madison away "Yea sure, great. See you later" I mumbled, stretching to hear what was being said even though I was no more than six feet away. Darn this headache!

"Did it hurt when they gave you a new heart?" One brunette with fake hair extensions asked, her perfectly manicured nail drawing hearts over the blue finish of the car.

"Umm.. No" Ricky retorted, pulling the collar of his shirt in defence against the heat "I was drugged and it was new lungs. Not a heart"

"Are you going to be our teacher every day Mr. Under - Ooops, I mean... Ricky" Another girl asked, she flipped her straight blonde hair with one hand and ran her hand down his left arm with the other. I almost died!

Storming in to either rescue him (or kill him... I hadn't decided yet) I screamed his name and watched as he squirmed off of the edge of the truck and ran towards me, fully aware that he was in deep trouble.

"Hey- Hey Babe" He gulped, kissing my lips that had fallen open in shock "How was your morning?"

"What's all this?" I ordered, crossing my arms across my chest as I raised one eyebrow

"Umm, Amy. These are some of my students. There is Mandy, Amanda, Krisee, Aria, and Jane" One by one, the girls before me raised their hands and waved as Ricky said their names. I wanted to smack their stupid grins right off of their pretty pampered faces "Girls" he called "This is my girlfriend Amy"

The girl referred to as Krisee, the one who had asked about Ricky's heart, approached me and wrapped her arms tightly around me. "I would just like to thank you for helping this man get a new heart. He is just so sweet!"

"I know... he's my boyfriend" I sang, raising my voice as if talking to a child. What was this girl? Stupid? (Duh!) "and it was lungs... not a heart"

"Well still..." Her voice dropped and she _onced_ me over with her eyes, totally disappointed with the girl her hot teacher was wasting his time with. She turned towards Ricky "See you tomorrow?"

"Of course" Ricky smiled politely stepping aside so that Krisee could round up her peers and leave us alone

"What was that?" I snarled, hopping onto the edge of the truck. I felt sicker than ever.

"Nothing" Ricky shrugged his shoulders, joining me in the trunk. He turned to his left and reached behind him, pulling out two submarine sandwiches. He handed one to me and watched me grimace "What? You don't like subs? That wasn't the case a month ago when you surprised me with lunch"

"It's not that... I'm just not hungry"

"You don't look that good. Are you sure you're alright?" He placed the sandwiches down beside him and grabbed his bag, pulling out a small plastic container of pills

"It has just been a rough morning" I replied, gesturing for Ricky to hand me the pills as he unwound the lid to his plastic water bottle.

I took the water from his hand as he slid his meds into his palm "Don't be jealous" He warned, tipping his head back to shove the four large pills into his mouth

I handed him the water and moved my hand to his chest, still used to those time where Ricky needed my help for everything; even sitting up "I can't help it. When Grace said you were teaching as well as coaching, I freaked"

Ricky took in a sigh of relief. He hated taking his medication but knew he desperately needed them "You don't need to freak. Because I'm not going anywhere and neither is our relationship. Forget those girls. They mean nothing to me"

"I know" I yawned, resting my head on Ricky's shoulder, suddenly aware of how hungry I really was "How about those sandwiches?"

"You got it!" He chimed, reaching over again to his side to grab the food "You're free this Saturday right?"

"No actually" I lifted my head "I've been meaning to tell you. Grace's birthday is this weekend. She's throwing a party. We kind of have to go"

"That's what I wanted to ask you about. Grace invited me this morning after class. I told her we would be there"

"Good, because when I don't answer she stalks me until I do"

Ricky laughed, bumping his bicep into mine in that _don't hate your sister, she's nice_ kind of way "So it's a date?"

"It's a date"


	11. This Ain't No Party

**If this story reaches 110 comments before May 1st, I will update early for once!**

* * *

"Which one do you think she will like?" I asked Ricky, who was busy kissing the back of my neck with his lips as I searched through an expensive rack of cashmere sweaters at a popular department store in the mall. In my right hand was a beige outfit, in my left, a black one.

"Do I care?" Ricky mumbled, pulling the sleeve of my tank top, revealing more bare skin

"Okay!" I giggled, pushing him away "Do you mind?" I dropped my voice to a serious whisper "People are starring!"

"You need to stop caring about what people think" he retorted, rushing in for another try at my bra strap.

"Well I do care!" I rebutted, pushing him away even harder than before so I could flail the hangers I was holding into the air "Seriously though! Which one?

Frustrated, Ricky ran his fingers through his hair and grunted, puffing out his cheeks as he expelled a loud breath "Umm... That one" He said, pointing to the beige sweater

"Perfect!" I cried, hanging the black sweater back on its rack "Now all we need is a belt!"

"Oh my gosh! Amy! This is taking foreverrrrr!" Ricky whined as he followed me to the other end of the store.

_What a baby!_ I thought, rolling my eyes "Help me pick a belt and then we will go. I promise! I just want to make this birthday special for Grace by getting her a great gift! Its not just any birthday -"

"Yea, I know. It's her 19th. You've told me this before Ames. Many times actually. And I agree. It is a special day for her and she does deserve a great present from her awesome sister" He ran his hand over my shoulder "but we have been here for hours!"

"And I said we were leaving! Go wait in line. I'll do this by myself"

"Thank you!" Ricky shouted, kneeling down to praise me, me kicking him away in laughter. He giggled and pushed himself off of the floor to join the check-out line already busy with four other customers.

I flipped my attention to the rack of belts on my left and quietly debated between a brown leather belt and a black one with a gold clasp. Deciding on the black one, I slipped into line with Ricky who to my surprise was next in line for the cash. Together, we pitched in for Grace's gift. I paid for the sweater and he covered the belt and some earrings that had brought us to this store in the first place.

We left the store a few minutes later, holding hands as we ran to the car, eager to get to Grace and help her set up for her 19th birthday. Her party tonight was for her closet friends which included Ricky and I, Madison, the entire cheerleading team, the book club, some jocks from Grace's church, and some sophomores from Sunday school. When I got to thinking about it, it was really impossible for this party to have any less than 50 guests. Luckily for Grace and really everyone else as well, the party was going to be unchaperoned.

Mine and Grace's parents had unanimously decided that they trusted Grace enough to give her a party without adult supervision as long as she stuck to the given rules that had been reinforced since we were both small children. No drinking, no drugs, no sex etc. Personally, I thought this was favouritism. My birthday was in less than 30 days and absolutely no one had given an unchaperoned party any thought at all.

The party tonight would be held at Grace's house, with my mom and dad as well as her parents back at my house for a quiet dinner while Ashley was away at a friends house. There was no way Grace (or me for that matter) was allowing Ashley into a party for seniors. It just was not a good idea.

Exiting the mall and jumping into Ricky's truck, we raced down the highway and onto the street closest to Grace's. While in the car, I gently lowered the box holding Grace's present into a large gift bag. I covered the top of the bag with white tissue paper and taped the card we had filled in at home to the side of the bag. _Perfect._

Grace's house had two garages; which was typical for a family with a bread winner like Marshall. When we arrived, her driveway was already filled with cars brutally crushing the vision I had of us parking comfortably inside of her garage. Ricky parked next to the curb against her lawn and stuffed the keys into the front pocket of his jeans.

"You took your meds before leaving home right?" I asked, stepping out of the truck onto the grass, suddenly aware I'd forgotten to ask before heading to the mall

"Yes mom" He said dryly "And you?" He questioned, raising an eyebrow as he joined me on the grass. I chuckled, fully aware as to what he was referring to. _Birth Control. _We hadn't had sex since the night before his transplant and now that he was back in good health, had decided that tonight we would the night. I figured it was a good thing that I was starting again on the pills I had stopped taking. My period hadn't been regular lately and I was 12 days late. Trying not to give it much thought, I prayed these pills would help regulate my flow.

We linked arms climbing up the freshly cut grass towards the front door of my sister's house. Pink and white balloons were arranged in a beautiful bouquet of string and ribbon, tied firmly to the black lamp post next to the step leading up to the front door. From our spot on the porch, we could hear a steady rhythm of loud music coming from inside. Ricky stepped ahead of me and jogged up to the door bell. Pressing it firmly with the plate of his thumb before stepping back to join me in front of the door.

Straining my neck, I was able to hear a slight pounding from behind the door, growing closer and closer over the party's loud music. A loud click unlocked the door, swinging it open to reveal Grace in a white blouse, her hair in gorgeous blonde layers. From behind her, I caught sight of about 20 kids from our school and thought back to the cars parked in her driveway, subconsciously assuming the remainder of her guests had parked up the street.

I squealed when I saw my sister and ran into her front hallway to give her a hug, her gift bag flinging over her neck as I wrapped my arms around her. "Happy Birthday!" I squeaked, rocking her back and forth with my new found giddy excitement. Ricky chuckled at my enthusiasm and entered the hall behind me, closing the front door with his right foot as he charged in to save Grace from suffocation. Grabbing the present with his left hand, Ricky lowered me to the ground with his right and pecked Grace on the cheek as he congratulated her.

"This party looks amazing Gracie!" I complemented as I slid off my sandals and tossed them into the hall closet over some recently discarded boots.

Relieving Ricky of her gift, Grace smiled "I had a lot of help. Dad stopped by to hang up streamers since my mom was out getting dip and Marshall had an emergency"

"I hope everything is okay" Ricky replied concerned as he aligned his own shoes with the corner of the carpet

"Oh don't worry. He gets these calls all the time and its usually just some intern who doesn't know what they are doing..."

"Been there... Done that!" He laughed, sliding his right hand over my shoulder. Not expecting it, I jumped and shot him an awkward glance of surprise, watching him recede apologetically.

Before I could gather up an apology, the doorbell rang announcing the arrival of even more guests to the already crowded home. Grace flashed us a smile, bending her knees to place her present on the floor against the wall connected to the busy living room "Do you mind?" she said, gesturing to the door

"Not at all" Ricky replied, stepping back into the empty coat rack that had been in that house probably longer than I had been alive. Grace squeezed by us and opened the door to some kids I didn't know. Ricky paced into the adjacent room with his hands in his pockets. I knew he was admiring his surroundings. Being a doctor, Marshall had a lot of money which certainly explained the amazing decor that Grace had lived with her entire life.

I followed him into the living room, scoffing at a large group of guys who were rolling dice on the glass coffee table Grace's mom had spent 6 weeks waiting for as it was being shipped from Japan. Like I said... Marshall makes a lot of money. Two guys exploded into a fit of laughter as I shot my hand up to my forehead. The headache I had been fighting for the past week was coming back with a vengeance in reaction to the noise of the party.

"Is it okay if I take your hand or are you going to jump again?" Ricky raised his voice as the music grew magically louder

"Sorry about that... you startled me. It was nothing against you" I replied, closing my eyes

"Are you okay? Your headache isn't back is it?"

"A little... I'll be fine" I blinked twice

"I still think you should call Marshall and ask him about it. I don't think constant migraines are normal..."

"You worry too much. I've just been going to bed late lately... exams are coming soon and I want to keep my grant money for school. Can we just get some air?"

He looked around the room, and nodded in the direction of some jocks he must have met at school "Yea sure. Why don't we go out on the back porch for a little bit?" Liking his idea, I grabbed his wrist and pulled him back into the main hall then into the kitchen. A package of fresh cannolis sitting on the counter next to the 7Up caught my eye. They were my favourite dessert. And up until this moment, I hadn't realized how hungry I had been.

"Grab a few" Ricky said, interrupting my thoughts as he stole a ketchup chip from its tacky green bowl. I pondered his suggestion but a wave of nausea and head pain overcame me. Last night was the last time I was ever staying up until three am to study for english. I was a disaster!

"No its okay. I was up so late last night I think I just need a minute. Instead of going outside, why don't you give me half an hour. I'll head on over to Grace's guest house where we were going to spend the night" I slipped my hands around his neck and pulled myself into his chest "And then you can come join me for a little nap..."

"Ames" He whispered "Its the middle of the day..."

"We'll lock the door" I replied, blowing on his ear "Sounds good?" I pulled away and smiled as Ricky nodded frantically. This was just what I needed to change how crappy I was feeling. Pecking Ricky on the lips, I exited the kitchen through the back door and strolled across Grace's well kept lawn, removing a key from my purse to unlock the door to the guest house. I slipped inside and closed the door, drawing in a deep breath of air conditioned perfection. Out of Grace's entire house, this room was my favourite.

I threw my purse on the side table next to the leather lazy-boys and circled the room, recollecting the times as children when Grace, Ashley and I had played hide and seek inside of the guest house. Suddenly in the mood for a snack, I skipped into the kitchen and stuck my head into the freezer where an unopened box of orange popsicles awaited my presence.

Licking my lips, I tore open the box and grabbed the first package, flinging it onto the counter. Once the box was back in its place, I ripped open the white plastic film around the frozen treat and watched the wrapper flutter into the stainless steel sink, firmly molded into the cream coloured marble counters of the kitchen. Moaning in ecstasy, I took a large bite of the orange popsicle, my stomach churning as I swallowed.

Balancing the popsicle in my left hand, I braced myself against the counter top, my head throbbing. My guts doing summersaults. _What was wrong with me? _Dropping the popsicle into the sink, I threw my hands to my mouth and raced towards the bathroom in the back of the guest house. Removing what looked to be an organ or two, I vomited. And then I cried.

I was sick! I had the flu! With three weeks left of school, a boyfriend who was just out of the hospital and a sister celebrating her birthday, I had the dam flu! I couldn't afford to be sick! I had a late period to worry about, not to mention the... Wait! _Late? I was... late! _Like a slap to the face, it hit me. Fighting the urge to vomit what was left of me, I wiped my tears and pulled myself to my feet.

Again tearing out of the room, I ran back into the kitchen to the side of the fridge where a very cute kitten calendar hung. Dragging my finger from that day's date to last month, I counted silently in my head. _No no no no no! This wasn't happening! What would Ricky say? What would Grace and my parents say! I couldn't be... Could I?_

Pregnant! I was 12 days late, nauseous and moody, hungry and hormonal! All of it made sense and yet I couldn't believe it! This wasn't right! Ricky had just gotten out of the hospital, he was happier then he had been in years. A baby would change everything. His life was over.. my life was over.

Dazed, I somehow carried myself over to one of the leather loungers. Plopping down in defeat, a scary thought occurred to me as the reality of a baby settled inside of my skull. What if the baby had Cystic Fibrosis? This fear vanished as quickly as it came for I remembered what Ricky had told me once. When I had asked him how he had caught CF, he had told me that it was genetic and that both of his parents had had the defective gene. Flashing back to a website I had visited the night after meeting Ricky, I remembered reading that as long as one parent was not defective, their child would be a carrier of CF instead of suffering from it. Which meant that if I was pregnant, our child would be fine. After the many tests I had taken after meeting Ricky, it was official that I was not a carrier of the gene for Cystic Fibrosis.

With a million things running through my head, it was hard to settle on just one. When i should have been thinking about how to tell the potential father of a baby I believed to be inside of me, I kept thinking back to Grace that day in the hospital where she had mentioned a baseball scholarship at Stanford. Ricky still hadn't said anything about this opportunity and to be honest I had forgotten all about it up until right now. What if Grace was telling the truth and Ricky was just hiding the scholarship from me because he was scared I'd be mad. Ricky couldn't just take off half way across the country like that! Not with a pregnant girlfriend and baby on the way! There was just no way we were going to be able to make this work! We were a couple.. not a family..

I snapped out my daydream and wiped my eyes, sniffling my tears away as the door to the guest house opened and Ricky appeared. _Had it been a half an hour already? _

"Hey!" He greeted, what I felt was all too enthusiastically, but at this point, I just didn't know anymore, nor did I care. Noticing the grimace across my face, his cheery expression changed "What's the matter?"

Unable to stop myself, I burst into tears and flew out of my chair, into his arms. I sobbed into his shoulder shaking uncontrollably. He consoled me with slurred whispers and rubbed my back. His smell was soothing. He smelled of cologne I had bought for him at a drugstore and... and beer. _Beer? _Pushing away to stare at him with concern, I felt another wave of nausea. He smelled awful!

"What's the matter amee? Talk to mee!" He cried, I could feel the worry in his voice

"Have you been drinking?" I stammered, my nostrils flaring

Ricky's gaze dropped to the floor and he shuffled his feet "Umm.. yea. I ran into some guys on the team and they offered me a beer. So I had a couple? What's the big deeeel?"

"It sounds and _smells_ like you have had more than a couple! That's your idea of a party? Sharing illegal drinks with a bunch of idiots? You know how Grace and I feel about alcohol! You know how my parents feel about alcohol! How could you!"

"Why are you getting so upset! It isn't a big deal!" He shouted

"It's a VERY big deal! I can't believe you!" How could he do this? Here I was, about to admit to him that he was going to be a father and he was off getting drunk! It was obvious I couldn't trust him. It was obvious he wasn't capable of being a responsible father. He couldn't even care for himself or be a role model to guys younger than him. I was _so_ out of here.

"What?" He shouted, his arms flailing through the air, so wildly that I had to back up to avoid getting whacked in the face "You upset that I'm not the perfect guy you thought I was? Well I've got news for you Ames! Even hospital patients fuck up...! What's your problem?"

"My problem?" I screamed "MY problem? What about you Mr. Untrustworthy? How come you can go tell the whole world everything buy you can't tell me?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Stanford Ricky! I'm talking about Stanford! Grace told me about the scholarship! Its obvious you feel as if I can't handle the truth and I'm beginning to feel the same about you..."

Ricky stepped into me and grabbed my arms harder than I think he intended. I whined in pain. His breath smelled like one beer too many. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing! It means let go of me you creep! You're drunk!" I cried, doing my best to shove my boyfriend away. To my surprise, he let go and staggered backwards. Unfortunately I wasn't able to hold back my tears and grabbed my purse, blurry eyed and sobbing "I am out of here!"

Storming out of the guest house and onto the lawn towards Ricky's truck, I heard him running up behind me, shouting my name. I reached the truck and tugged on the handle, cursing at the realization that it was locked.

"You are going to need these amee!" Ricky teased, dangling his car keys out in front of him

"Give them to me!" I ordered, jumping forwards.

He pulled the keys away and snarled "No! Come back inside lets talk this out!"

"I don't want to!"

"Well then what do you want?"

"Far away from you!" I cried, aware of a large crowd of people gathering on the lawn in awe. Grace pushed her way through the crowd and ran towards me. Pulling me into a hug, she mumbled something to Ricky and took his keys. Calling a friend from the crowd, she said something about too many beers and a safe a ride home. From my spot against my sister's chest, I heard a car drive off and when I finally lifted my head, Ricky as well as the group of kids were gone. Grace was left, standing next to the curb of her house, with me pressed tightly against her, shaking and crying uncontrollably. Pregnant and all alone.

* * *

A/N Hello everyone. Sorry for the late update. I don't know what else to say other than that I might stop updating for a while. The show has taken a turn for the worst and Ricky and Amy are going through some tough times. I hope everything works out, but I am really devastated over their rough patch and just don't have the motivation to write about secretlife at all, let alone Ricky and Amy. I will still be updating To Save A Life once a month as I have finished writing this story. But as for Adjusting, I will not be updating until I feel ready. I hope you understand.

Aswell - This chapter counts as chapter 10 although fanfiction says it is 11. The previous chapter only got 6 reviews and I just wish people would review more. My goal for this chapter is 14 reviews so that I can reach 110. I would really appreciate the support!

Thanks for everything guys! See you around!

Riverbkstar


	12. Consequences

I sat against the headboard of my bed, nervously attacking my thumb nail with my front teeth. It was a quarter to one in the afternoon, a lazy saturday where I was completely lacking any ambition to face the science homework mocking me from its spot on my desk. The hotdogs my mom had served me an hour ago were churning in my stomach and it was taking everything in me not to throw up.

In one more hour, I would be making my way downstairs to deliver a lame excuse to my parents about how I needto go to the library. When really I would be making my way across town to make the doctors appointment I had scheduled last Monday. The thought of making this pregnancy official ate away at me. There was no way I was capable of handling this all on my own. I needed my parents and my sisters... but most of all, I just needed Ricky.

We hadn't spoken since that day at Grace's party. He had texted me that evening, and even called a few times. But his persistence was no match for my strict silence and he had given up before midnight. He had no idea why I was upset other than the fact that I knew he had lied about Stanford. The possibility of my being pregnant probably hadn't even crossed his mind, and now it was about to become a horrifying reality.

A distant doorbell registered somewhere in my mind, but lost in deep though, I paid it no attention. Moments later, my mother was at my door irritating me with the fact that Ricky was downstairs.

"I don't want to see him" I mumbled coldly, wiping away a stray tear

"He's been coming over every day this week honey" she sympathized, shuffling over to sit on the corner of my comforter.

"Where was I?"

"I thought you needed space.. and he accepted that at first. But Amy, sweetie.. its been a week. And I don't know what you two are fighting over..."

"And that's because I don't want you to know!" I snapped, throwing the pillow I was hugging against my chest over the edge of the bed

My mom patted my leg and stood up "I don't have to know what happened to see how great you two are together Amy. Don't let whatever happened ruin what you two have. A couple of months ago, you were begging for a miracle. Don't shut him out the minute you get it. He deserves better... and frankly... so do you"

I turned my face away from my mom to avoid her seeing my tears. She walked out of the room slowly, pausing momentarily in the doorway to contemplate offering me more advice. I whipped away the blanket wrapped around me and checked my face in the mirror. Wiping my eyes and pulling my hair back, I entered the narrow hallway leading into the living room.

I found Ricky pacing the living room floor, his hands in his pockets. He looked up for a brief second, stopping abruptly in his tracks when he noticed my arrival.

"Hey" He said slowly, taking a step towards me.

I took a step back and ran my fingers through my greasy hair "Where's my mom?"

"She umm.. took Ashley to a friends house. She said I could stay as long as I wanted, that she had talked with you and was sure you would come out eventually"

"Since when do you listen to what people tell you to do?" I remarked, taking a seat on the arm of my living room couch. Ricky lowered himself onto the ottoman.

"I'm really really sorry about that Amy. You have no idea"

"What are you sorry about? The fact that you didn't tell me about the baseball scholarship.. or that fact that you got drunk at my sisters birthday party?"

"All of it! Amy listen to me!" He pleaded, rushing towards me "I didn't plan on getting drunk at that party! I had literally one beer, thinking I could handle it. But its obvious that I haven't had a drink on over a year and it was just too much too soon! I never would have allowed myself to get wasted like that Amy! Never!"

"But you did Ricky! You allowed your self to let lose, you lost control and now I don't see how I can ever trust you again! Especially now!"

"Especially now? Amy what do you mean _Especially Now!_ Are you really that mad that I didn't tell you about Stanford? It was this silly scholarship I applied for like eight months ago! I didn't even think they had even considered me until they called and offered me that grant! You weren't around the day I got the call. I had no one to celebrate with, but Grace was visiting and I don't know - I guess I just felt like troubling someone else with my problems for once. It didn't make sense to tell you about something that was never going to happen"

"But you shot all of this down before even talking it over with me Ricky!" I cried, slipping out of his reach to pace behind the couch "We could have worked something out! You deserve to achieve your dreams too!"

"And what? Leave you all alone after you worked so hard to get accepted into a college near by so that we could be together? I couldn't do that to you! Not after everything you did for me!"

"You don't see that this isn't a game Ricky! Its not about fairness, its about being in this together! You and me! Not just you! Not just me! Us! You, me and the b -"

"The what?" He asked, crossing his arms over his chest

"N-Nothing" I stammered, my face growing warm. Another wave of nausea overtaking me

"No! You said something! What we're you going to say?"

"I can't tell you. If I do, your life is ruined and you will probably never forgive me"

"Amy, that could never happen!" He reassured, walking over to me as I began to cry "Tell me baby, whats wrong?"

I leaned my head against his chest as he wrapped his arms around me. I took in a deep breath. _It was now or never_. "I'm.. We're... p-pregnant"

It took him a second. And then a couple more. His arms dropped to his side and he backed away slowly, exiting the living room without another word. He opened the front door and stormed out of my house, slamming it loudly behind him. I leaned against the back of the sofa in both sadness and amusement.

Ricky entered my house again, closing the door as loudly as he had the first time. He ran into my arms and held me tightly against his chest. I could feel his heart racing a mile a minute. "I'm so sorry Amy... I've been a complete ass. It was so obvious that something else was going on here. I should have taken the time to be here for you instead of reacting so strongly to nothing" He released his hold on me, taking my hands in his and smiling softly "So its official? I mean, you are absolutely sure?"

"I have a doctors appointment in an hour. But I already know... its just to get some options. Ricky?"

Twirling a stray strand of hair with his fingers, Ricky looked down at me sadly. I could tell he was trying to be brave "Yea Ames?" he choked, his voice quiet

"I don't want to have an abortion... and I don't want to choose adoption, but I also..." I mumbled, starting to cry "I don't want you to leave me"

Pulling me into his arms, Ricky held me more tightly then before. He stroked the back of my head as I cried into his shoulder, my body convulsing as I sobbed. "Amy, Baby... that won't ever happen. I love you so much" He paused and pulled away, bending his knees to meet me at eye level "We're going to get through this Amy. You, me and the baby. We're going to me a family!"

* * *

An hour and a half later, Ricky and I sat patiently awaiting the doctor's arrival. We were in one of her examination rooms, with me on the table covered in wax paper and Ricky on the stool next to me, holding my hand. He caressed the back of my palm with his thumb, smiling affectionately at me to try and calm my fears.

"You took your medication before coming over to my house right?" I asked, trying to bring myself back to reality where there were bigger problems besides this possible pregnancy

"Umm no. I didn't. I went to see Marshall earlier this week and he said that everything is fine. He said it was up to me, that I could stop if I wanted to, so I did"

"Ohh" I replied, not sure how to react. On one hand, this meant that Ricky was doing better, that he was becoming healthier by the minute. But on the other hand, it meant that there was still a possibility his body could reject his new lungs, which is exactly what his pills were preventing.

"Okay Amy" my doctor greeted, entering the room with a folder filled with my patient history "I am just going to do a quick check up and then give you a test to take. It shouldn't take more than a few minutes"

Understanding the doctor's procedure, I nodded my head. Ricky squeezed my hand still aware that I was extremely nervous. Following the doctor's directions, I lowered myself onto the table and lifted my feet into stirrups so that she could _investigate_. Ricky stayed near my head the whole time, constantly brushing back my bangs in an effort to sooth me.

Eventually the doctor had me sit up, and handed me a plastic cylinder with a white lid. She told me to enter the bathroom out in the hall, fill the cup with urine and then put it in a plastic bag. We would receive the results within 10-14 days. As ricky ran to get his truck from the underground parking lot, I entered the bathroom and followed the doctor's instructions. After handing an assistant the sample of urine, I exited the office and took a short elevator ride down to the main level of the building.

Leaving through the automatic doors we had entered the building with, I noticed Ricky's blue truck parked next to the wheelchair ramp. It began to drizzle as I jogged towards his car, shaking myself free of water droplets as I hopped into the passengers seat.

Ricky moved to pull the truck into drive, but froze, sitting back in his seat to stare at me curiously. He took in a deep breath and let out a large frustrated sigh.

"Honey?" I asked, rubbing his shoulder

"I didn't mean for this to happen you know" He said shortly, his face growing heavy with sadness

"I know Ricky.. believe me... I know"

"So what happens now?"

"We go on living... and in two weeks... we find out the truth"

* * *

A/N Hello guys! Sorry it took me 2 months to update. I was not really on good terms with Secret Life at the beginning of May, reviews and reads were down, and I was super busy. So i just postponed the update to June instead. I hope you enjoy this new chapter :)

Also - A comment was posted on this chapter reminding me of something I should clarify. In real life, a patient can find out if they are really pregnant within hours. But for the purpose of the rest of my story, I wanted Amy and Ricky to wait a while before figuring it out. I hope this doesn't bother anyone. Please keep in mind that it is a fan fiction and that medical stories are not always accurate. I did not write this story without being educated about pregnancies first. LOL Thanks!


End file.
